Page 41 of Sweet Southern Heat

“We hope so,” she replied, settling her empathetic gaze on me. “The doctor will be in shortly. She’ll be able to tell you more.” I nodded my thanks, and she walked out of his room,leaving me to stew over all that had happened in the past twelve hours.

I’d gone to Olivia’s last night looking for comfort. She'd welcomed me with open arms, and I’d lost myself in her for a while. She’d offered me solace when my heart was aching. I feared I’d just lost my brother over her, but I didn’t want to give her up. Maybe I was selfish, but I wanted them both in my life. Now, I might not get the chance.

When I got the call last night, I’d been asleep in Olivia’s bed. I hadn’t seen any point in sneaking out of there since Lyle had already known about us. What was the harm in finally spending the night with her? Then my phone rang, and my entire world shattered.

Olivia had insisted on coming with me, and it was a good thing. I’d been too distraught to drive and barely held it together long enough to get to the hospital. When we arrived, I learned that, after our conversation, Lyle had gone into the house and locked himself in the bathroom. When he didn’t come out again, his girlfriend went to check on him. He wouldn’t answer her or open the door, so she picked the lock. She found him slumped on the floor barely breathing. The drugs were still on him. There was enough for ten people, and they had no idea how much he’d consumed. I was listed as his emergency contact, so once the ER doctor stabilized him, they called me to tell me he was there.

Olivia stayed with me in the waiting room, holding my hand and rubbing soothing circles over my back as we waited for him to be transferred to the ICU. I sent her home when they finally moved him to his room since they only allowed one overnight visitor, and it had to be family. She was reluctant to leave me, but there wasn’t anything she could do. She finally relented and went home around four a.m. I’d been at his bedside ever since.

Guilt churned in my gut as I watched the steady rise and fall of his chest. The ventilator was the only thing that kepthim breathing at the moment. It was just like that last time. Except now, it wasn’t a fake prescription pill laced with Fentanyl causing an accidental overdose. This time, it was intentional. It was his attempt at numbing the painIhad caused. If I hadn’t been so hell bent on tracking him down last night, this never would’ve happened. He may have already known about Olivia and me, but I didn’t have to rub it in his face. Hearing it from me and knowing I was choosing her sent him over the edge. If he didn’t pull through, I would never forgive myself.

I hung my head in my hands and fought off the wave of emotion threatening to drown me. He was my baby brother. I was supposed to protect him, not hurt him. This was all my fault, and I needed to make it right. If he came through this, I would make sure he knew how much I loved him, that he was more important to me than anything else in the world.

My phone buzzed, and I pulled it out to find three new messages, all from Olivia. The battery was almost dead, but I promised to text her with any updates. She had been so worried when she left out of here in the wee hours of the morning. Despite what Lyle had done to her, she didn’t want anything bad to happen to him.

I opened up the message thread and quickly scanned her texts before tapping out a quick reply.

Me: No changes. Waiting to talk to the doctor. My phone is about todie. I’ll call you later.

Her reply came almost instantlyas though she’d been waiting by her phone. Unease swirled in my gut, and guilt clogged my throat. I needed some distance. Lyle’s overdose had put thingsinto perspective for me. As much as I wanted Olivia, I couldn’t risk losing my brother over her.

Olivia: I’m so sorry. Do you need anything? I can bring you acharger.

I closedmy eyes and let my head fall back on my chair, swallowing hard as I formulated my response. I was too raw to see her right now. Shock and despair hung heavy around me like a storm cloud.

Me: That’s okay. JD is bringing me one. Talk to you later.

I tappedout a quick text to JD asking him to grab a charger on his way in this morning. I’d spoken to him about an hour ago, and once he got over the shock of what had happened, he promised to bring me fresh clothes and a toothbrush. I hit send, and before I could contemplate texting Olivia again, I pocketed my phone. The next moment, Lyle’s doctor entered the room to give me an update on his condition.

Olivia wasbreathless when she opened the door to reveal me standing on her front porch. She reached for me and pulled me into her embrace. I wrapped one arm around her waist halfheartedly. I was exhausted, and my nerves were shot fromsitting at Lyle’s bedside. There were dark circles under my eyes, and my shoulders hunched like the weight of the world rested on them.

“Come in, come in,” she urged, ushering me inside. “Any news?” she asked hopefully, and pain speared through my gut. Her genuine concern over my brother made this that much harder. “Is he awake?” Her hands twisted together as she awaited my response. I shook my head, and the light in her eyes dimmed. “Oh,” she replied, dropping her hands to her side as a forlorn expression flitted across her face.

“I, uh, came here to talk to you about something else.”

“Okay.” She drew the word out wearily as though she could sense what was to come.

“I need to take a step back from this,” I said, motioning between the two of us, “and focus on Lyle.” Her back went ramrod straight, and she swallowed hard. “The doctors think he’ll wake up, hopefully soon, and I need to be there when he does. He needs to know I’ll be there for him and that he is my top priority.”

“What are you saying?” Olivia asked, her voice trembling. My heart cracked open and threatened to reveal my closely guarded feelings for her. I was falling for her, but she couldn’t know. It would make what I had to do that much harder.

“I can’t be with you, at least not while my focus should be on Lyle and his recovery. He’s in this situation because of me.”

“No, he’s not,” Olivia asserted, taking a determined step toward me. “Don’t you dare blame yourself for the situation he’s in.” I squeezed my eyes closed, trying to stifle the emotion threatening to leak from them.

“It’s true,” I proclaimed, and tears welled in her eyes as she shook her head in denial. “He overdosed after I talked to him, after I confirmed that you and I were together. It broke him.Ibroke him.” My voice cracked on that last sentence, and the tears she’d been holding back spilled over her cheeks.

“No,” she whispered, bringing a hand to her mouth.

“Lyle has made many mistakes over the years, but he’s still my brother. He's the most important person in my life. Maybe, if I had tried harder, I could’ve gotten him the help he needed before now. I should’ve known that you being back in town would be hard for him. Not that I’m blaming you,” I added hurriedly. None of this was her fault, and I didn’t want her to think I held her responsible for anything that had happened. “You have every right to be here, but I didn’t consider how it would affect him. Then, to find out you and I are together…” I let my voice trail off. I didn’t know what to say. Her features were already twisted in agony, and the last thing I wanted to do was add salt to the wound.

“He was already in a bad place. The last time I’d talked to him, I could tell something was off, but I was too busy, too caught up in my life to dig any deeper. I won’t make that mistake again. That’s why I need to focus solely on him for now. I need him to pull through, and then I need to make sure he gets better.”

Olivia sniffed once and swiped away her tears. Straightening her back, she drew in a shuddering breath.

“I understand,” she said. She held her head high but couldn’t hide the quaking in her voice. This was hurting her, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. Lyle was my number one priority right now. Maybe once he recovered—because I was holding out hope that hewouldrecover—we could revisit what was growing between us, but until then, my happiness had to take a back seat to my brother’s health and well-being.

I wanted to pull her to me and comfort her, but I feared if I touched her just once, it would completely shatter my resolve. I needed to walk away from her, so I could make sure Lyle gotwhat he needed. If he believed I was choosing her over him again, he would never forgive me. And next time he fell into a downward spiral, he might not come back from it.

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