Page 11 of Desperation

“Need some help?” I jumped at the sound of Devon's voice and turned to see him standing in the doorway. He leaned casually against the jamb, sipping his drink. I blew a piece of hair out of my face, wishing I had a ceiling fan in this room to keep me cool while I struggled with the world’s most infuriating piece of baby furniture.

“What was your first clue?” I chuckled helplessly, motioning to the mess sprawled across the carpet. He smirked and stepped inside, setting his coffee on the nightstand, his feet now clad in only socks. He’d shucked his riding boots and was now padding across the little room with pale blue walls to take a seat next to me on the floor. The closer he got, the more my stomach fluttered. When his thigh brushed against mine as he settled in beside me, a spark traveled up my leg and landed in my core, demanding to be noticed. I squeezed my eyes shut against the sensation and pinched my lips together to suppress a gasp. The contact felt like a bolt of lightning zapping my desensitized and neglected body back to life. He stilled momentarily as if he’d felt it too.

Clearing his throat, he reached for the page closest to us. “What have we got here?” he inquired, scanning over the instructions. He started grabbing tools and pieces, laying them out to form a shape. Once he was satisfied he had all the parts he needed for the time being, he set to work. Occasionally, he asked me to hand him something or hold two pieces together as he secured them, but otherwise, I was merely a spectator. Watching him work was oddly arousing. I tried not to notice his big, strong hands or how his forearms and biceps flexed with each twist of the screwdriver, but I found myself staring at him, enthralled by the sight.

In no time, we were securing the end piece to the side rails, and the crib was finally starting to take shape. We were attaching the other end when I felt another presence in the room.

“Kingsley,” Drake’s gruff voice sounded from above.

My body tensed, but Devon’s demeanor didn’t waver.

“’Sup, man?” he asked without even looking up. He continued to tighten the screw he was working into the slab of wood I was trying to hold. I looked down and noticed my hands were shaking. Devon paused, and his eyes drifted to where I gripped the rail. He noticed it too, and his jaw ticced. After a second, he looked away and moved to the next screw.

“Hannah.” Drake's voice was low and menacing, and I feared what I would find when I looked into his eyes.

“Yeah, babe?” I asked, avoiding his gaze by pretending to focus on what I was doing.

“What’s going on? Why are you and Kingsley putting our son’s crib together?” He said Devon’s last name with the inflection of a sneer. I could tell he was irritated, but he had to hold back since we weren’t alone.

“I kept messing it up. So when Devon got here, he offered to help. You know how bad I am with tools.” I tried to deflect, to blame it on my lack of skills and knowledge so he wouldn’t think I was trying to replace him. He snorted out a humorless laugh.

“Yeah, no kidding. Still, don’t you think this is something I would want to do? I really don’t need another man coming in here, putting my kid’s crib together.” There was a challenge in his tone, his anger boiling just below the surface. At that, Devon straightened to his full height and faced Drake. I shrank back, expecting a punch to be thrown. From whom, I didn’t know, but I was sure there was about to be a fight.

“She wanted to surprise you. She was nearly in tears when I came in because she thought you’d be upset. I assured her you wouldn’t be and that you’d appreciate the gesture.” Stunned, my gaze darted between the two men. Devon had covered for me. He lied for me. He told Drake the one thing that could keep him from losing his shit and taking it out on me after he left. Devon’s gaze slid to mine expectantly. He needed me to corroborate, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to contradict him.

“I just wanted to take something off your plate.” The faux sincerity slid right off my tongue, just like it had dozens of times before when I needed to placate him. “You’ve been working so hard lately; I just wanted to find a way to be helpful.”

He studied me a moment, his gaze flicking back to Devon before landing on me again. He nodded, and my body sagged. He bought it. Hook, line, and sinker. “Why don’t you go fix me a cup of coffee while we finish up in here?” He gestured toward Devon, indicating the men would finish up while I did my job and retrieved his drink. I rolled my eyes as I left the room and headed to the kitchen, pouring his coffee and adding just the right amount of sugar and creamer.

When I returned to the nursery, I could hear the two men talking. I stopped outside the door and listened, curious to know what they were talking about.

“Why the fuck are you here so early, Kingsley?”

“Bro, it’s almost ten. You did say morning when I asked when you wanted to ride.”

“I know what time it is,” Drake ground out. “But you’ve been here long enough to put this thing together.” I winced, knowing we’d raised his suspicions. “You’re not trying to move in on my girl, are you?” My breath caught in my throat, and I held it there.

Say no. Say NO!

“Of course, not. You’re like a brother to me.” I was simultaneously relieved and disappointed. My feelings for Devon were growing, approaching a more dangerous level with every look, every touch, and every little act of kindness. But I could never be his. Drake would kill me before he let that happen.

That thought sobered me. I needed to stay away from him. I needed to give my boyfriend his coffee, thank them for putting the crib together, and let them go on their ride. I’d be sure to at least look busy when they got back and hoped that Devon could take a hint.

Chapter Nine

Devon

Hannah was giving me the cold shoulder. She hadn’t spoken to me since this morning when she thanked Drake and me for our help putting together the crib. It was killing me to sit across the dinner table from her, eating the meal she'd prepared, and not be able to talk to her. Drake made it clear he had his suspicions and didn’t want me getting too cozy with her. I assured him he had nothing to worry about, and it stung a little to lie to the man who’d once been like a brother to me. I found myself doing that more and more these days. Lying to my cousin.

When he caught Hannah and me in the nursery together this morning, the lies spilled out freely. Even though we technically weren’t doing anything wrong, I knew he wouldn’t see it that way. The fact that Hannah picked up on the lie so quickly and expertly elaborated on it to minimize the damage both concerned and impressed me. She’d been doing this dance with him for far too long, and I was ready to cut in.

I was surprised when Drake once again invited me to stay for dinner. As much as I didn’t want to witness him and Hannah together, I couldn’t say no. I couldn't turn down an opportunity to be close to her. I needed to spend more time with her, to gain her trust, and find out why she stayed. Then maybe I could convince her to leave. Not just because I was drawn to her and wanted more than anything to be the man to hold her at night and take care of her. Even if that never happened, I still wanted her away from Drake. He was toxic, and if I was being honest with myself, he always had been.

Ever since we were kids, he’d had a mean streak. He was prone to violence and run ins with the law. If his daddy wasn’t the sheriff, I’d bet money he would have ended up in juvie at least once or twice. Easy to talk your way out of trouble when your father was one of the most powerful and intimidating men in town. I knew I should’ve beengrateful since that umbrella of protection had once covered my ass. But I’d learned my lesson. I’d turned my life around and walked the straight and narrow until I left for basic training. Guilt suffused me at that memory. I didn’t regret leaving and making a better life for myself. I merely regretted never coming back, never helping Drake see that there was more out there for him. I should’ve tried harder to convince him to enlist with me.

“How was your ride?” Hannah’s voice snapped me back to the present. She was slicing into a piece of chicken that had been marinated and grilled to perfection. When we returned late this afternoon, Drake fired up the grill and cooked chicken, steak, and vegetables for dinner. I hung around outside with him, even though I yearned to be close to Hannah.

“It was good. It’s been too long since I rode like that. We definitely need to do it more often,” Drake replied, spearing a slice of zucchini onto his fork. “Damn, woman, I don’t know how you make these vegetables taste so good,” he praised. She smiled weakly and muttered her thanks. “You gonna be around tomorrow, King?”

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