Page 97 of Season of Gifts

“I also told her that she ought to stay for tea and meet your spouses.”

She’d been part of his life since before he’d been born, a second mother to him.At any other time, presenting Alice and Jay to her would be cause for pride and delight.But the fog deepened, warning of the stories she might tell and the questions they would raise in his perceptive, empathetic spouses.

“Of course she should.”The words came automatically as he positioned Mother beside the door and opened it, letting in the chill.“Lina, how good of you to come.”

Chapter fifty

Alice

SpicyciderwarmedAlice’sthroat all the way down to her belly.She scooped another handful of mixed nuts from the bowl on the side table.She’d munched on more than she needed to since bringing the tree in with Jay, but the sun had disappeared an hour ago and she still hadn’t managed to corner Henry for a talk.A gal could get nervous wondering if life was about to implode.

With a smile hiding not-quite-gritted teeth, she carried her drink toward the stereo, where Henry was futzing with the controls.The low hum of choirs singing carols had occasionally become sing-alongs in the last few hours, rousing and mostly on-key renditions of the classics she knew from childhood.

Forced cheer wasn’t exactly the right word.But the five people in the room were sure putting a metric ton of effort into making tree trimming the merry Christmassy experience they wanted to be having.Except maybe Jay; his enthusiasm was genuine and fresh.And why not?

He had both of his dominants with him, even if neither had taken charge of the event.Mother had designated him her official decorator, which gave him an unending string of tasks to complete.He’d practically worn a path from the boxes of ornaments to the little sofa where Mother studied the options he brought her and assigned them places on the tree, and from the sofa to the tree, where he hung the selections while checking the overall impression with her, and from the tree back to the boxes.

Mother’s friend Lina sat beside her, and the two of them gasped and gushed and guffawed at Jay in his element.The tree he’d selected was marvelous.His eye for decorations was exquisite.His cherubic glee in donning a lace angel doily as a hat was infectious.

Reaching the stereo, Alice bent over Henry’s crouched form.He startled back, their elbows bumping.Just as quick, he steadied her forearm with his hand, keeping her cider from tipping, before he rose.

“Sorry, thanks.”She took a tiny sip for courage.“Anything I can help with?”Pretty nonthreatening, as openings went.She could work up to the emotional intervention.

Henry wrapped his arm around her in a side hug and kissed her temple.“Simply enjoy yourself, sweet girl.We’ve missed far too many moments this season already.I would like for you and Jay to have the relaxing, festive atmosphere you deserve.”

“That you deserve, too.”

He offered a noncommittal hum.“Your happiness is my happiness as well.”

Piercing his outer shell might as well have been building a particle accelerator with some straws and a phone battery.He sounded like himself; he acted like himself.A little less demonstrative with his affection than he would be at home, but his mom was in the room.

Maybe they’d had some monumental talk while she and Jay had been out, and Henry really had shed the distraction and anxiety from breakfast.His obliviousness to her and Jay and their dynamic as his spouses.But she didn’t buy it.That stuff didn’t dissipate; it got buried under layers ofmustandshouldandcan you help me with.

“Are you happy?”She pitched her voice low; her chances of getting Henry to unburden himself in front of the mom he was caring for lingered around zero percent.But if she could pull him away, even for a few minutes, they could start fixing the secrets and hurt feelings.“You’ve been under a lot of stress.If you wanted to talk—”

“I have you here in my arms for the holiday, my love.”He cradled her tightly to his chest and swayed to the Christmas waltz.The hollow of his neck welcomed her irresistible urge to nuzzle close.“Jay is entertaining Mother; she has color in her cheeks and a smile upon her face.What stress could reach me now?”

Temptation stung.Melting into his embrace, taking his words at face value, would be so easy.And telling him about haring off to visit her parents without his guidance would create new stress.

But she’d promised herself.No secrets and no lies.No heart-pounding fear that any minute Ollie would spill the beans to Mother.“The last two weeks have been hard on all of us.There are things we should talk about.”

“I’ve been distant,” he murmured.“Inconstant.I see that now, and how painful that must have been.”He rotated them slowly, their feet so close she kept sliding against the sides of his shoes.“But I will make it up to you both.I remain the man you married, sweet girl.You needn’t worry.”

Frustration sprouted, wound its way around her vocal cords.“It’s okay for you to admit—”

“I’m sorry, dearest, but it’s coming on six.”His arm rolled; maybe he’d been checking the time at his wrist.“The larger platters are still in the kitchen.Mother should eat something more substantial, and she’s been taking to bed earlier recently, aside from attempting to wait up for you and Jay last night.”

Shit.She hadn’t meant to upset Mother’s health routines.They’d been so late arriving.No wonder Henry had been anxious about checking on his mom.But the kitchen would be perfect.“I’ll go with you.I can help—”

“No, please, immerse yourself in the festivities.Seeing you enjoy yourself is immensely pleasing to me.”He nudged her hip suggestively as their dance ended.“Go on, my good girl.”

His good girl.She wavered on the edge of safewording.That would shake him up.But it would hurt him, and one thing she’d learned about Henry—even when he was calm and poised on the surface, his currents ran deep.

“We’ll talk tonight, though.I…” Sourness coated her tongue.“I really need you to hear me.”

“Whatever you need”—cupping her cheek, he sprinkled kisses in her hair—“I will provide.”

He strode from her, loudly praising Jay’s artful decorations and encouraging him to enlist her in the effort before he disappeared down the hall.

---