Page 101 of Revenge

“Ava. Please?”

I felt like shouting, please what? Please leave it, after what your father did to me and mine. But of course, he didn’t know about my mother,yet.

Taking a deep breath I demanded, “I want to see him.” My voice was strong and determined but it did not affect Kai. He stood tall, like a mountain I would never have the stamina to conquer.

“No,” he said in a firm voice. That pissed me off even more. Who the hell did he think he was to try and stop me from getting justice?

The son of the one you want justice from that’s who!

A horrible thought occurred to me. If it came to it, would Kai be able to choose between his father and me?

Shaking off that thought, I realised I hadn’t responded to him shutting my request down just like that, “Excuse me?”

Kai took me gently by the shoulders and lowered his head, “I said no. I won’t take you to see my father. What purpose would it serve?”

My legs trembled and I yanked out of his arms and turned away, pacing the floor in front of him, feeling thoroughly agitated, “It would give me a chance to say my piece, just like a victim does in court,” I explained, turning back, and stopping. I kept my hands moving, I couldn’t seem to settle. The whole thing was eating me up inside, I needed to see the fucker, hurt him like he had hurt me and my mother. What he had done to Suki bubbled inside me like lava.

Kai hadn’t answered, he just closed his eyes and raised his head to the ceiling.

“Did you hear what I said, Kai? I want him to say sorry for what he did. To admit that it was wrong.”

“And that’s it? he replied. His cavalier attitude annoyed me.

“He needs topayfor what he has done!” I shouted.

“Alright, calm down Scarface,” Kai replied, his usual dry wit kicking in.

“I mean it, Kai.”

He lowered his head and fixed me with a penetrating stare, “I know you mean it but you’refuckingclueless if you think that’s ever going to happen, Ava. So, you’re going to rage at an old man for all his misdeeds and you think he is going to allow you to smack him on the hand. Do you expect a man like Gerard to apologise and ask forgiveness for what he did?” he barked, now clearly annoyed. “That isn’t the way it would go down. As I said, he isn’t well, he’s on medication. The shit that came out of his mouth would probably only upset you more and I can’t let that happen.”

It was clear now that Kai thought my need to see Gerard was pointless, that it would hurt me more. I knew in his own misguided way, he thought he was protecting me, but he was wrong.

“You don’t know that,” I said, remembering the gun in my jeans. My true intentions were not those I had vocalised. I intended to say very little to Gerard, my Glock would speak for me. But if I told Kai I intended to kill his father, he wouldn’t allow me anywhere near him.

There was a tense silence before he spoke again, “I do know that, Ava. He’s a twisted fuck and doesn’t think he has done anything wrong. And even if he did, he won’t let you know that. The man is a stubborn old fool but as clever as they come. He managed to hide his true colours from me for years. Do I regret that, yes. Every fucking day. He broke so many codes when he was the head of the family and I wasn’t there to see it. You need to move on, Ava. Nothing good would come from seeing him as he is today. The man is rotting away, take some comfort in knowing that.”

My brow scrunched, this conversation was going nowhere, “Maybe I want to see it for myself. You want me to be your wife and form a partnership, even if it’s a temporary one. You said we could be friends. If you had to choose, who would it be Kai, me, or him?”

Kai’s shoulders slumped and he stepped towards me and took my face between his hands, “And I choose you.You’rethe one I am protecting here,notthat twisted old fuck.” His tone was now pained and full of raw emotion, and it spoke to that special place inside me. “What’s done is done, Ava and I can’t apologise enough for what happened. But believe me when I say, Gerardissuffering. He has cancer, the aggressive type and he is in pain daily. The man is paying his dues, maybe not the way you envisaged, but he will answer for what he has done. It is a twist of fate that he is paying for his sins in this life. And he will continue to do so in the next one when death finally comes.”

A shiver ran through me. I wanted nothing more than for Kai to place his arms around me and make everything go away. But I knew if I did, I couldn’t live with myself. Ineededto pay Gerard back, I had always felt that need, it was like a beast I had to exercise. What I hadn’t known in the past was how I would do that. Now due to my mother’s revelation, there was only one way to do that; with a bullet.

The fact that this would make me a killer did not compute.

Under normal circumstances, it would have been foolish to believe I could go toe to toe with someone like Gerard Kinlan, but he was an old man now. Weak,justlike I had been as a child.

Kai must have seen the flicker of emotion as it passed through my face, my determination, that desire to hurt Gerard as he looked worried, “You need to put the past behind you and concentrate on your future,ourfuture.” He looked at me like I was responsible for bringing so much disruption to his life; almost like he was pleading with me to let it go.

I didn’t know how that made me feel now,ourfuture as he had called it; our business arrangement. One which I was certain may have naturally shifted into something else. But with Gerard hanging over our heads, I wasn’t sure how that could ever happen now. Could I marry Kai if I couldn’t trust him, “How can I have a future with someone I don’t trust, even if it is only a temporary one?”

Kai looked deflated as he dropped my face, “Please stop throwing that word around. You can trust me, Ava.”

My eyes suddenly felt gritty, “You say I need to move on, but it’s not just about me. Not anymore. Not after what I found out this morning.”

I jumped as some branches hit the window, the scratchy noise causing my skin to itch again.

Kai stepped forward with a curious expression, “What did you find out?” I held my breath, if I told him about Suki and he already knew, I would have to walk away. I didn’t care what he threatened me with, if Kai had turned the other cheek when he found out a defenceless woman had been raped, I wouldneverbe able to forgive him. That would be the end of us.

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