Page 23 of Shattered Fate

Gage wouldn’t say something like that. He ordered me coffee and gave me a ride home. He let me pet Baby. Gage is kind. He’s Max’s brother, and Max loved me.

Maybe that’s what Gage said. He didn’t want to talk to me because his brother loved me, and I got him killed.

I can’t cry. I don’t want to cry. Tears won’t solve anything. Jerricka says it’s important to let my feelings out, but there’s a time and place to do that. Zane won’t talk to me if he thinks every time he does I’ll cry. He’s tired of hurting me, and he’d rather avoid me if it means he’ll stop.

I blink to clear my eyes and count backward while I wait for him to answer my question.

He stands and says, “Do you want the truth, even if it will hurt you?”

I nod, but I’m not sure. I’m tired of hurting, too, but life hurts. If I wanted to avoid pain, I would hide in this house for the rest of my life and not let anything touch me. I’d become brittle,unfeeling, and eventually I’d blow away, turned to dust. I’d no longer be a human who has a mind, a spirit, and a heart.

“Max left Gage a note, a letter, and asked him to look after you if he passed away. He didn’t know what would happen the night we went to that fundraiser, but he took precautions. He was a reporter, and he was used to being in dangerous situations.”

Warmth fills my entire body. Max cared enough to ask his brother to look out for me.

Zane splashes cold water all over me.

“I told him you’ve been okay, that we’re taking care of you. I don’t know why Davenport waited so long to go through Max’s things. Or maybe he had the note since the day Max died, and he was only now getting around to doing anything. I don’t know, but I said you didn’t need him looking after you. Ash and Clayton are in prison, and I call every day, Z. They can’t get to you anymore.”

“Then he left.”

“Then he left. If you’ll feel better hearing it, he seemed a little disappointed we didn’t need his services.”

“His services?”

“Davenport’s a private investigator, Zarah. He’s paid to follow people and dig up secrets.”

That’s why he was at the café the second time. Max wanted him to follow me. It wasn’t a coincidence, and he didn’t ask to sit at my table because he liked me. I’m so stupid. Maybe the paparazzi wasn’t a fluke either. “How long has he been following me?”

My brother presses his lips together. “I don’t know, and I didn’t think to ask. I doubt he’s been watching you since Max passed away. Douglas would have spotted him, and the dogs would’ve known if he was lurking around the yard.”

“He’s not coming back.” He was patient and kind, but now I know it’s only because Max asked. He didn’t seem that...I don’t know. Mean.

Zane sits on the armrest and braces his arm on a leg. “Do you want him to come back?”

I would want him to come back if he liked me, not because Max left him instructions to spy on me. “I want to know.”

He doesn’t ask what it is that I want to know, and tension drains out of me. It’s exhausting trying to explain my muddled thoughts, yet I can’t always assume people understand what I’m thinking. That’s the part of using my words I’m going to have to work on, but Zane is my brother and he knows what I’m thinking without me having to pick every thought apart. In this instance, I take the easy way out. I feel like I have a gob of peanut butter on the roof of my mouth, and my tongue hurts trying to talk around it.

He smooths his hand from the top of my head down to the nape of my neck and stands. It’s protective, and in his way, he’s telling me he loves me. At his desk, he opens his laptop and taps on a few keys. He writes something on a sticky note and holds the yellow paper out to me.

“This is his cell number. I’ll leave it up to you to contact him. If you want to invite him out to the house, you don’t need permission. You live here, and this is your home. If you meet him in the city, I...” He shudders and rests his forehead against his clasped hands. “I know I need to give you space to grow and learn and figure things out on your own terms, but Z, Gage is a man, and if you get close to him...”

“He’ll want sex.”

His gaze softens. “You’re beautiful. He’d be crazy not to.”

“Gage knows what happened to me. What Ash made me do. It’s on the news.”

“Ash gave Nathalie to me, and I used her because I could.”

“Gage isn’t like you.” The words come before I can stop them, and Zane flinches. I hurt him, and I couldn’t stop it.

He only nods. “I hope for your sake he isn’t.”

Later that day, Stella comes home after her classes and I peek into the suite she and Zane share. She’s sitting in the window seat reading a book and she looks like a poster for a motivational quote. Her face is peaceful, her lips turned upward.

“You came for me” is always fast in my heart whenever I see her. It’s how I show my gratitude. Without her stubbornness, without her grit, without her need to save Zane and reveal the truth about our parents’ deaths, I would still be a prisoner at Quiet Meadows. Ash’s hideous ring would still be on my finger, and he would still be hurting me.