Page 64 of Break Me Knot

Cole remains a shadow at first, watching from doorways. His scent carries notes of guilt and longing that I don't understand, but slowly, like a cautious wild thing,he begins to join us. First at dinner, then breakfast. He doesn't speak much, but his presence is... important.

More bags appear in my room daily… soft clothes, blankets, pillows, although I’ve managed to make do with my own clothing so far.

No one mentions them, no one demands I use anything in them.

I have to resist tearing into their contents.

Every day I stay makes the day I must leave so much harder to imagine. Every day I’m here makes that one day I’ll leave harder to find.

One morning I stand in my bedroom, the nest doors beckoning with an irresistible urge. I cross the room and slowly open the doors, my hands trembling on the handles. I glance over my shoulder, sure that someone will come and tell me not to enter; that the space beyond is no place for an omega like me, but of course that doesn’t happen.

Adrian, Zane and even Cole won’t stop me.

They'd be overjoyed to find me here. I’m not stupid enough to think they wouldn’t. They are doing everything they can to make me want to stay.

I turn to the space inside, heart pounding, breath shaking, as my gaze roams over every square inch which is calm, inviting, and filled with natural light from the bay windows. I shouldn’t want things that aren’t mine. I’m an illegal omega. I know things that would put these three alphas in danger. If I’m caught here, they’ll be jailed. I’d be taken back to Haven and sold faster than my next heat spike, but the urge…oh, the urge to sink onto the mattress in this nest room. To roll around in all things soft and sensuous, drenched in their scents. I see all of us in here, naked, hard cocks, swelling knots, sweating, pleasuring, cumming…

A cream-colored blanket catches my eye, impossibly soft-looking where it peeks from a new bag lined with others along the bedroom wall. Just looking at it makes my fingers itch. The urge to take it, to lay it atop the bare mattress in the nest slams into me. I see it woven with the other soft things carefully folded in many other bags. Blankets and pillows arranged just so, creating a safe haven for all of us. The vision is so vivid it makes my chest ache… the way Adrian would smile, how Zane would tease, even Cole's quiet presence...

I jerk back from my thoughts like I've been burned, my heart racing.

Dangerous.

So dangerous to want.

I know better than to have a nest like that of my own.

The few times Lars caught me trying to arrange blankets resulted in the scar wrapped around my hip when he caned me. I shudder, pushing the memories away…and still the cream blanket calls to me. Before I can stop myself, I snatch it out of the bag and retreat to my closet nest. My fingers work it into the existing structure, weaving it between my worn blankets. The contrast between my old, threadbare blankets and this new luxury makes my throat tight.

Forbidden. So forbidden, but no one is coming to take me away. No one will tell me I can’t do this.

When I lie down, I can't help but let the soft ends brush against my cheeks. It's so different from my old scratchy blankets. This is plush and warm and… oh soright. A small sound somewhere between a whimper and a groan escapes my throat as I press into it, a sound I didn't even know I could make. For just a moment, I let myself imagine what it would be like to build something real. Something permanent. A proper nest in that sunken room, filled with my alphas’ scents and their presence.

Why do their scents make me feel like this, and…fuck! I called themmyalphas.

I curl tighter around the cream blanket. When did that happen? When did they become mates my omega recognizes as mine?

I can't want them. Can't dream of belonging. Dreams are dangerous things. They make you weak and vulnerable. Make you stay when you should run.

But Gods, I want to give in.

I have to be realistic. They can't be mine. The secrets I carry would put them in danger, and I won't be responsible for more death. More pain.

But a treacherous voice whispers:What if you don't have to run? What if they could protect you? What if...

I press harder into the blanket, trying to silence the dangerous thoughts. I can’t fall into the trap of being an omega. I can't let myself hope. Hope is more dangerous than anything Haven ever did to me.

Somehow I drift off. A soft knock pulls me from sleep, and I reluctantly untangle from the cream blanket.

“Mira?”

I emerge from the closet, smoothing my old clothes. Zane's scent reaches me before I open the bedroom door, making my heart race before I even see him. He stands there, practically vibrating with excitement, and my heart does that stupid flutter it always does when he smiles at me like that. His presence fills the doorway without being threatening, somehow managing to be both powerful and playful.

My skin tingles, warmth pools in my belly, and my scent sweetens. I have to fight the urge to bare my neck, to seek his touch. My fingers twist in the hem of my sweater to keep from reaching for him. It's getting harder to resist these instincts around them, harder to maintain the distance I need to keep us all safe. This daily growing want for them as mine fills me with terror.

He stays in the doorway, respecting the invisible boundary they've all maintained since I arrived. But even from there, his presence fills my senses. The way his light hair falls across his forehead makes my fingers itch to brush it back. The playful light in his sea-blue eyes draws an answering smile from me before I can stop it. There's something so infectious about his joy, something that makes me want to let down my guard.

His expression shifts when I smile, something raw and wanting crossing his expression. His pupils dilate, nostrils flaring as he catches my sweetened scent. “You're so beautiful.” The longing in his voice makes my chest ache. His own scent deepens with desire, and a warm shiver steals through me.

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