Page 57 of Singing For His Kiss

CHAPTER TWENTY

It hadn’t taken long to pack her meagre things. Less than five minutes. Her mind reeled, and her gut pinched with dread.

There was only one way she could stop David, and that was to turn herself in. She’d certainly be charged, end up incarcerated, but when it came down to it she'd done the wrong thing and should pay the consequences.

She had to tell James about David. Tell him about the whole sordid mess. It was the only way she could protect both of them. James would stand up to a man like David. He could do that.

She would do her best to make sure David was arrested, but first she had to sacrifice herself to do it. There was no other way.

And the fantasy?

That was just a fantasy.

It was all it ever would be.

She needed to prepare herself against James’ reaction. That she really wasn’t the person he thought she was. He’d see her for who she really was. Shame stoked a bruising fire in the pit of her stomach.

James and Madeline had given her the greatest gift anyone could ever give. Nobody had treated her like they had. As though she were special. Worth it. For that, she owed them. She would always remember them. Someday, the pain would fade.

Steeling herself, she hitched the strap of her backpack onto her shoulder and swung open her bedroom door. James stood with his knuckles ready to knock.

“I’ve just come to see how you’re feeling.” His gaze traveled from her face to her pack, and his face fell.

All the air seemed to be sucked out of the room. She shook her head, refusing to acknowledge that denial was part-lying. She opened her mouth, but only a sad whimper escaped.

He pinned intelligent eyes on her and caught her cheek in his palm. “What’s going on, Elizabeth?”

Her mouth worked open and closed. The tender look on his face was undoing her. What she’d give not to be in this mess. What she’d give to be someone else.

“Is this all because I kissed you?” He traced her bottom lip with his thumb.

Her breath rushed out, her emotional torment an exquisite torture. “Yes…no.” It was the best thing that had ever happened to her. And the worst.

James stepped into the room, bringing his chest up close to her. His hand brushed her cheek to cup her nape, holding her when she would have taken a step backwards, gaze pinning her to the spot. “I wanted to kiss you, Elizabeth. I did it deliberately. In fact, I want to kiss you deliberately again.”

“James, I have to tell you…”

His fingers firmed, capturing her hair. “Kiss me, Elizabeth.”

She gasped as he brought his mouth to hers. His tongue swept into her mouth, his lips pressed firmly against her mouth. She groaned as his masculine, spicy taste exploded in her mouth. She swayed against him, leaning into him. Needing him as though he were some type of a drug.

He was right. One kiss wasn’t enough. Would never be enough. She wanted more. She wanted all of him. Her thoughts cleared enough to realise how badly she needed to kiss him back.

Her hands snaked around his neck, and she pressed the length of her body against his. A part of her logical brain still worked, guilt kicking through her growing desire. She had to tell him. Couldn’t let him do this with a lie over her head.

She tugged free of his hands. She had to tell him now, before he did things that would haunt him forever. “James…stop…there’s something I need to tell you…”

James wound an arm about her waist, another at her nape, pressing a kiss at the base of her neck. “When I first laid eyes on you when you’d rescued Madeline, I knew you were special. Of course, for saving my daughter, and not just because you’re her nanny. It was how you cared for her when she was out of danger, how you still care for her now…but you weren’t just special for her…you’re special for me too. So special…hell, what I’m trying to say is that…I…I want more for you than just to be a nanny. I want to be with you, talk to you, evolve our relationship. Make it something…more.”

“No…James, no…”

“I think I know what upset you at the beach. It wasn’t an upset stomach, was it? You’re worried that you’re a replacement for Hanna. Don’t think that. Never think that. You’re a gift, Elizabeth. A beautiful gift.”

She started at him, confusion clouding her mind. If he only knew. “But…why?”

James groaned, something like pain lining his face. His fingers tightened against her nape, through her hair, his breath trembled, and she felt trepidation radiating from him in waves. “You have no idea, do you? Not a dammed clue. I want you, Elizabeth. You. Not Hanna’s memory. I want to make love to you with every fibre of my being. Every cell in my body. I. Want. You. Dammit. I need to know…do you feel the same about me? Do you want me as desperately as I want you? Please tell me you feel something for me. Something more than mere friendship. God help me if you don’t, but I have to know. Tell me, Elizabeth. Tell me you want me as much as I want you.”

She could do nothing but cling to him, his powerful words washing through her soul, the way a cleansing breeze could wash away a winter’s frost. Icicles shook, fell shattering into nothingness. Her fingers curled in his shirt, bunching the material in her tight grasp.

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