Page 80 of Crossroads of Love

“Lena,” he says softly, his voice dropping just a little, his gaze holding mine.

I swallow, suddenly very aware of how close we are and how easy it would be to close the gap. My heart beats a little faster, and I wonder what it would feel like to let go, to stop holdingback. But then the moment passes, and he releases my wrist, his hand falling back to his side.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Yeah,” I say, my voice a little breathless. “I’m good.”

We continue riding; the pace is slower now and more relaxed as we make our way through a small grove of trees. The air is cooler here, and the scent of pine and earth fills the space around us. It’s beautiful and serene, and a sense of calm washes over me. The tension in my chest eases a little more with each step the horses take.

“You know,” I say after a while, breaking the comfortable silence, “I think I could get used to this.”

“Riding?” Gavin asks, glancing over at me.

“Being out here. With you.”

He smiles, and it’s that smile that does it. The one that’s not just for show, the one that reaches his eyes and makes me feel like I’m not alone in this, like I’m safe. “I’m glad you came.”

“I needed it,” I admit, surprising myself with my honesty.

But it’s true. I needed this more than I realized. I needed the quiet, the space, and maybe even Gavin himself. He has this way of making everything seem manageable. Like no matter how bad things get, I can handle it. Maybe it’s just him being there, being steady, but it’s more than that. His calm and gentle energy makes me feel safe, and after everything that’s happened, that’s something I didn’t think I’d feel again.

We ride in silence for a little longer, the sound of the horses’ hooves steady on the ground, the rustling of the wind through the trees filling the quiet. Eventually, we reach the top of a small hill, and the view stretching out before us takes my breath away.

The land seems to go on forever, with rolling hills covered in tall grass dotted with trees and mountains in the distance. The sky is a brilliant blue, and the sun dips lower, casting a goldenglow over everything. It’s beautiful and peaceful, and I feel like I can breathe for the first time in a long time.

“This is incredible,” I whisper, not even realizing I’m speaking out loud.

“Yeah,” he agrees, his voice soft beside me. “It is. I can’t tell you how long it had been since I’d noticed a sunset until I came back here.”

“Same. Henry got into the habit of making this a Sunday night ritual for us. Jayla and I loved it. We stopped for a bit after Aaron died, and when we started up again, it was only a few months later that Henry was diagnosed.”

“Aaron didn’t go?”

“No, couldn’t risk being outside of cell service in case he was needed.” I shrug. “Now I realize that probably was for other reasons.”

“Don’t start second-guessing everything, okay?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t go down the rabbit hole trying to figure out where the signs were. I did that with Sarah, and it will only drive you crazy. It happened. It sucks, but there’s no reason to beat yourself up or expend any more energy on that, okay? You’ll never understand it because you’re not a person who would ever do that to someone.”

Whoa, that’s…deep. He’s way more emotionally mature now than ever.

I inhale and exhale slowly, feeling his words run through me. I see what he means, but it’s easier said than done. We sit there for a while, just taking it all in; the silence between us is comfortable and easy. A sense of peace settles over me, a feeling I haven’t had in what feels like forever. And it’s not just the view, or the ride, or the fresh air, it’s Gavin. It’s being here with him and not feeling as though I have to walk on eggshells around him.

I glance over at him and let myself imagine what it would be like to let go of all the fear and all the hesitation. To stop thinking about the past, about Aaron, about everything holding me back.

What if I could just be here, at this moment, with Gavin?

“Hey,” he says, suddenly breaking the silence. “You ready to head back?”

I nod, but a part of me doesn’t want this to end. “Yeah, let’s go.”

As we start the ride back, the sun dipping lower behind us, I steal one last glance at Gavin. I smile, feeling my heart flutter as I feel so much love for him.

Chapter Eighteen

Gavin

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