Page 102 of The Shots You Take

Adam nodded, his lips dark and wet, his hair a mess. He looked dazed and debauched and, god. How was Riley supposed to walk away from this?

He did, adjusting himself in his pants as he exited the house.

“I’ll see you later,” Adam called after him.

Riley waved as he got into his truck. Adam smiled at him from the front porch the entire time Riley backed out of the driveway. When he was on the road, and couldn’t see Adam anymore, Riley exhaled and told Lucky, “It’s going to hurt like hell when he leaves.”

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Harvey Tuck’s grave was easy to find; it was absolutely covered in flowers. The one next to Harv’s belonged to a married couple, who Adam guessed were his parents. The thought crossed Adam’s mind that Riley would be buried here someday. He pushed it away.

“Hi, Harv,” Adam said. “I was at the funeral but I never got a chance to…” He scrunched his nose and tried to think of the least weird way to say what he meant. “As you can probably guess, your funeral was packed. I arrived right before it started and barely got a seat. And then, well, I kind of ran off. We don’t need to get into it, but Riley wasn’t thrilled to see me. Anyway. We’ve worked it out now.”

Adam glanced around to confirm he was alone. He knew people talked to graves like this, but it still felt weird. And personal. He’d been lucky enough to have never lost anyone close to him before.

He blew out a breath and said, “Okay. A few things. First, I wanted to tell you that I always thought you were the best dad I’ve ever met. I was so jealous of Riley, having a dad like you. And I tried to—” Adam had to swallow hard. “Shit, okay. I tried to be the kind of dad you were. As soon as Maggie toldme she was pregnant, I thought, ‘I’m going to be like Harvey Tuck. My kids are going to get that kind of dad.’” Adam laughed. “Okay, my real first thoughts were ‘Holy shit, pregnant? What are we going to do?’ but once the shock wore off, I thought about what kind of dad I wanted to be.”

Adam picked up a carnation that had fallen and tucked it randomly into one of the arrangements. “I’m not saying I succeeded. I try to be a good dad, but obviously I wasn’t around all that much. And when I was around, I felt like an intruder, kind of. Maybe that was all in my head, though. Anyway, Maggie did a great job with them, and I didn’t get in her way. So that’s something.”

“I also wanted to thank you for inviting me to stay with your family here during those summers, way back. Summers at home were never great for me, and I think you guessed that. Well, you met my parents. And, yeah, I could have fucked off to Italy or somewhere with some of the guys, but Riley never wanted to do that, so I didn’t want to either.” He huffed out a sardonic laugh. “Probably should have figured that meant something but, you know. Hockey IQ doesn’t translate to the real world, unfortunately.”

“Which, um, yeah. I also want you to know that I love your son.” He glanced up at the sky, then back at the tiny temporary grave marker poking through the flowers. “I don’t know how you feel about that. Maybe you don’t think I deserve him, after everything, and I get that. I made a lot of mistakes with him, but I’ve been trying to fix them. I want to deserve him.”

Riley had probably never told his parents much about Adam, but Harv had been a perceptive man. “I’m going to do my best to deserve him, from now on. I don’t know what our future looks like, but if there’s a chance we can be together, I’m going to fight for that.”

Adam had to blink a few times to stop his vision from blurring.“I promise I won’t hurt him again, and I’m sorry I did before. He deserves to be so happy, and I hope I can give him that.”

He let out a shaky laugh, then said, “So all of that is just to say, yeah. Good job on raising Riley. And Lindsay, because she’s awesome. They were lucky to have you, and I know you’re proud of them both.”

“Oh, and I’m hosting the hockey banquet tonight. Maybe you heard, I don’t know. I’ve got big shoes to fill, though.” He laughed again. “I’m actually nervous about it. Although the kids probably just see me as the opening act for pizza. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

Adam felt good about hosting the banquet. He liked having a chance to honor Harv in some small way and to help out the town Harv had loved so much. The town that Adam loved too.

“I didn’t bring flowers, but I thought you might like this.” He pulled the moon snail shell he’d found on the beach out of his coat pocket, then placed it at the edge of all the flowers. “It’s pretty, right?” He hoped it wasn’t a weird thing to leave.

“Okay, well. Susan said you’ll probably be in the room at the banquet, so see you tonight, I guess. But if you decide to skip it in favor of, I don’t know, playing a game of pickup with a bunch of NHL legends in Heaven, I don’t think anyone would blame you.”

Adam gave an awkward wave. “Bye, Harv.”

* * *

Riley still could barely believe what he was witnessing.

Adam Sheppard was standing at a podium in front of a yellow-­and-black balloon arch, next to a screen that displayed a slideshow of photos from the most recent Avery River Minor Hockey season. He was wearing his glasses and reading the achievements of various teams and players with thesame amount of grandeur someone might use in a speech for a Hockey Hall of Fame induction.

“Brady Mosher not only led his team in goals this season, he not only led theleaguein goals this past season, he set a newrecordfor goals scored by a U13 player in the entire North Shore hockey system!” Massive cheers and applause broke out, and Adam applauded along with them. “That’s right. We are in the presence of greatness tonight. And Brady, that’s why you’ve been named the U13 MVP for this season. Come on up here, hotshot.”

Adam maintained this level of enthusiasm and awe for even the youngest house league players who could barely skate. It was sweet, and the kids were clearly loving it. Even from his seat at the back of the room, next to Mom, Riley could see that. This would be a memory these kids would have for the rest of their lives. And Riley didn’t think he’d be forgetting it anytime soon himself.

Because Adam was doing this. For Dad, for him, for kids he didn’t even know, for Riley’s hometown. Tomorrow he’d be back in Toronto, but tonight he was here. And later tonight, if Riley had anything to say about it, he’d be in Riley’s bed.

“He’s wonderful,” Mom whispered.

“Yeah,” Riley agreed. “He is.”

Cathy had said a few words about Dad at the start of the banquet, and that had been emotional. But Adam had done an excellent job bringing the mood back up and making the night about the kids. Dad would have approved.

After the awards were all given out, Adam announced that pizza was available in the adjoining room. This led to a stampede of kids charging out of the banquet room, except for the ones who charged up to Adam for a photo and an autograph. Riley stood, but stayed at the back of the room.