Page 31 of The Shots You Take

Riley was sure it wasn’t the same situation, but he nodded.

“You should invite him to stay with you,” Mom said. “You’ve got that lovely guest room, and lord knows he can’t be sleeping well on those lumpy old things at the River Bend.”

Absolutely fucking not. “No one is forcing him to stay in town.”

Mom and Lindsay exchanged a look that Riley didn’t like. He knew they didn’t understand why he was so angry with Adam. They didn’t know, because Riley had never talked to them about it. Even if he’d wanted to, he’d never knownhowto talk to them about it. Adam had always insisted he was straight, and though Riley had his doubts about that, especially when Adam was fucking him, it certainly wasn’t his place to share those doubts with anyone. Riley had long suspected that his family might think he’d had unrequited romantic feelings about Adam, and that that had caused the rift between them, at least in part. It would have been an easy assumption to make,given the way Riley was sure he’d always looked at Adam. The way he’d talked about him.

And, anyway, it was true. The feelings had been unrequited.

“It would be nice for you to have some company,” Mom said. “I know I’d feel better if you weren’t alone out there at that house.”

Riley could hear what she wasn’t saying: we expect your father’s death to break you, and someone should be there to help.

Well, it wasn’t going to be Adam Sheppard, that was for fucking sure. Adam Sheppard, who wasdivorcednow. Who Riley had already nearly kissedtwicein less than twenty-four hours, despite hating him. Distance was crucial.

“I’m fine. And I have friends.” Then he blurted out, “I’m actually heading to see Darren and Tom after this.”

Mom brightened. “Oh, that’s good. Would they like some bread?”

Riley stayed with his mom and sister for a while, eventually eating lasagna and then helping with the dishes. The whole time, his head was swimming with Adam Sheppard. He could still feel Adam’s fingers around his wrist, and Adam’s breath against his lips when he’d said, “You know why.”

Riley hated how weak he’d felt in that moment. He hated the sharp flash of excitement that had rocked him when he’d learned Adam was divorced. He hated that twelve fucking years hadn’t been enough time to get the man out of his system.

Now he sat in his truck in Mom’s driveway and texted Darren:Can I come over?

Darren replied quickly, telling him of course he could. About twenty minutes later, Riley was driving up the long unpaved road that wound its way through maple trees to Darren and Tom’s house. He was glad he’d come, already feeling lighter with how normal this felt. Darren and Tomwere his friends now, not Adam. His social life was easy and comfortable and openly queer, with no misplaced feelings. His sex life was equally uncomplicated. He would feel better after spending time with his friends.

Darren greeted him with a kiss, while Lucky was greeted by Darren and Tom’s two Great Pyrenees, Josephine and Claudette.

“Did you get some sleep?” Darren asked as they watched the dogs happily dance around each other.

“Some.”

“Good. Have you eaten?”

“Yeah. Sorry if I’m interrupting your dinner.”

“Absolutely not. Tom is reheating some cassoulet. Come sit. We’ll let the dogs play out back for a bit.”

They went to the living room, with its high ceiling and giant stone fireplace. Riley sat on what he’d come to think of as his usual end of the sectional sofa. Darren took the dogs to the large fenced-in area behind the house, then joined Riley on the sofa, one cushion away. “So how are you?”

“I don’t know,” Riley said. “Not great.”

“Have you talked to your therapist?”

“Not yet.”

Darren made a disappointed noise.

“Iwill,” Riley said. “Jesus Christ, I’ve been kind of busy. It takes a while to get an appointment anyway.”

Darren stared at him, eyebrows raised, until Riley said, “Which is why I should make the appointment now.”

“Right now,” Darren said. “Get out your phone.”

He watched as Riley dutifully booked an appointment online for two weeks from today, and insisted Riley put himself on the waiting list for last-minute cancellations.

“There. Done,” Riley said. “Happy?”

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