Page 67 of The Love Simulation

I stop in the bathroom to get cleaned up while Roman continues on to the common room. Unsurprisingly, the image that greets me in the mirror is horrendous. My face is puffy and the tip of my nose is red from crying last night. I’ll still have to go out there and work with Roman, but I don’t need to look like I’m falling apart.

I soak a small hand towel in water and let it sit on my face for a few minutes while I try rebuilding my battered emotional barriers. I need to tap into Vice Principal Rogers and bring forth the superpowers I use at school when someone is testing me, despite the fact that I feel very un-super right now. When I take the towel off and glance in the mirror, at least I don’t look as run-down.

When I come out of the bathroom, Roman is at thestove making breakfast, so I go to the comms station to do a visual scan of the outside cameras. The conditions look perfect. No dust storms, no debris, and the antenna is up and functional. I even see our rover, Miles, slowly moving around in the sand.

There’s a light indicating we still have unopened messages, and for a second I’m physically sick, like my stomach is about to take another free fall, as Principal Major’s voice replays in my head.

“Food is ready,” Roman says to me, and I’m only too happy to turn away and go to the table.

“What is this?” I ask as I take the seat across from him but avoid direct eye contact.

“Eggs and Spam. I would have made this sooner if I knew we had it. Earth, Mars. I don’t think it matters where you are, it’ll taste the same.”

I break a piece of the Spam off with my fork and sniff. “Is it real meat?”

“Yes, it’s real meat,” he says with a slight chuckle.

I take a tentative bite, surprised by how flavorful it is. Crispy on the outside, since Roman fried it, and soft on the inside.

“What do you think?” he asks after I take a few more bites.

“It’s not bad.” I know the response is short and clipped, and even though I hate this subdued air surrounding us like fog that’s hard to see through, I don’t have it in me to keep giving more of myself.

Roman finishes his food first and waits for me. Instead of allowing him to take my plate, I cover it as I slip off my stool.

“I’ll do the dishes since you cooked,” I say, and without waiting for him, take my plate and his to the sink.

I’m positive the vibe I’m giving out screams “I want to be left alone,” but Roman follows me to the sink. At first it’s easy to ignore him as he leans with his back against the small counter and his arms crossed over his chest. I focus on making sure each particle of food disappears. But when I grab the pan and begin washing, my barriers start weakening.

I see the pan and the dish towel in my hand, but I also see the softness in Roman’s eyes when he brought me breakfast in bed and hear his sweet baritone when he began humming theMission: Impossiblesong so I wouldn’t give up on finding Miles’s battery. When it comes down to it, I want to believe what he felt for me is as real as what I’ve always felt for him.

I set the pan down. Roman’s still right beside me, stubbornly waiting for me to acknowledge him. I close my eyes and let my head fall against his arm, and we stand together as the minutes pass by.

When I tilt my head up to finally meet his gaze, I know that no matter what plans he did or didn’t make with his dad, my heart belongs to him. He rests his hand on my hip, and while I have plenty of time to move away, knowing full well the cameras are right on us, I stay in place as he bends down and kisses me. It’s tender and sweet, and every bit the reassurance of his feelings I need.

“We good?” he asks, his grip tightening slightly at my hip like he can’t bear to let me go.

“Yeah,” I say. “We’re good.”

He finally releases me, and it’s really time to get the day started.

Roman pulls out his journal, and I start dusting. When I’m back at the comms station, the blinking for the unreadmessage annoys me so much I decide to just see what it’s about.

It’s another message from the school. This time from a group of students, probably those enrolled in summer school. They’re all cheering on Roman and me, excited for the library remodel. It’s evident that to their minds, winning the money is pretty much a done deal.

“What do we need to do today?” Roman asks, coming up behind me.

I exit out of the message and rub at my temples as they begin to throb. Too much stress and not enough sleep.

“We need to clean the solar panels,” I say.

“How about I take care of those, and you rest today,” Roman says, scanning my face. “And don’t argue. You had me rest when I had a migraine, and you’re not looking all that great right now.”

I could be offended, but even after using the cool water to get rid of some of the puffiness, I know I must look bad. I feel it too.

“Fine,” I say. “But you’ll still need help getting the suit on.”

While helping Roman get ready to go outside, my head throbs and I can’t get the students’ faces out of my mind. It would be such a tragedy for their hopeful smiles to disappear if we didn’t walk out of here with money for the library.

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