Page 70 of This Means War

“No, I’m not laughing at you. I would never laugh at you.” I take a step towards her, but she backs away.

“No.” She holds up her hand. “Let me tell you something, Cole Jacobson. I am not going to let you reject me again. So, this is me rejecting you. You work too hard. You can’t accept help from people who care about you. You can’t even admit that you need God. You want to be Mr. Independent. Go be Mr. Independent.” She lifts her hand and pulls the ring off her finger, tossing it at me before dashing across the driveway and hopping in her car.

I stand stunned for a second before my body finally kicks into gear.

“Lydia!” I rush after her, but she’s already backing the car out of the driveway and she doesn’t stop.

I race to my truck, but my hands are shaking so badly I can’t get the key in the ignition. By the time I do, she’s gone.

Lydia

My heart is beatingso fast as I drive that I have to pull over into the parking lot of a gas station. What did I just do? The horrible scene replays inmy head, and I have to force myself to take deep, calming breaths. I threw my wedding ring at Cole. That was stupid. A heat of the moment response. Was I angry? Yes. I still am. But I’m married to Cole. I made a commitment to him before God. And Hilda. I mean, obviously the former is more important, but Hilda would be disappointed in me too. I can’t tell you the number of times the woman scanned my Pastry Treats while simultaneously telling me some story about her husband doing something stupid, then handing me my receipt and saying sagely, “But marriage is forever honey, so we forgive and move on. And don’t forget to eat some veggies too, Lydia.”

The thing is, the accusation Cole threw at me just now was true, and it’s that fact that hurts the most. My pride has been wounded, and I’m just so embarrassed to think that he knows I made such a big deal out of that night. He knows that all of these years I’ve been harboring this grudge towards him while he meanwhile hadn’t been thinking about me at all. Ouch. I feel vulnerable and exposed.

Cole felt those things too. The thought strikes me like a thunderbolt. He told me he was embarrassed about fainting, and I scoffed at him, so why would he want to tell me his real feelings about his diagnosis? Why didn’t I see that for him, getting diagnosed with diabetes was embarrassing? A blight on the image of a man who always has it together. Is it possible he wants me to see him as always having it together too? I didn’t think he cared what I thought about him. After all, I’m just the woman he marriedto save his political career. He might be physically attracted to me, but he’s never mentioned loving me. Never told me he cares about me as more than the mother of his children.

Maybe not in words,a small voice that sounds a bit like Josie whispers,but does a man who’s indifferent to a woman stay by her hospital bedside for an entire week? Does a man who’s not in love with a woman blow off work to attend a wedding with her? Does a man who isn’t in love with a woman defend her honor to his parents, her brother, and his entire constituency?

Suddenly I need to speak with him. I reach for my phone, only to realize I left it at the house. I’ll just go back. Maybe he hasn’t left yet. Hurriedly I turn my car back on and direct myself back home.

Cole

I call Lydia atleast a dozen times, but she doesn’t answer. Somewhere around the fifth call I start crying. Which means I’m a guy in his truck crying over his love life. Somebody call Luke Combs, because I’m here to inspire his next country song.

Finally, I give up on calling her and put my truck in drive. If she won’t answer my calls, I’ll just have to find her. There can’t be that many places she could be, right?

My phone rings, startling me. I swear when I see my boss’s name on the screen. I forgot all about work and the fact that I’m supposed to be driving to Traverse City right now.

“Hello,” I pick up the phone, hoping my voice doesn’t give away the fact that I’ve been crying.

“Cole,” Harrison says in his abrupt way, “you on your way?”

“Uh,” I stare at the road ahead of me. Technically I am driving. “Yup.”

“Good. Listen, I know you said you wanted to work less with Ashley, but I just heard from a friend that Pat Benton has a thing for blondes. I think it might be good to have Ashley there to flirt with him a bit, maybe swing things in Saul’s favor, so I’m sending her up too.”

“Harrison,” irritation flashes through me, I find his words disturbing on so many levels, “are you saying you want to use Ashley as bait. C’mon, that’s gross.”

“Cole, that’s business. And it’s not up for discussion. Now I know you have some sort of personal issue with Ashley, but you need to put on your big boy pants and get over it.”

“Harrison, she tried to wreck my marriage.”

Harrison sighs. “Ah yes, your mar-riage,” he stretches out the word, making it sound ridiculous. “C’mon, Cole, you think I haven’t been following the news? I know your marriage is just a front for your political campaign. And I may have said I was okay with you running for mayor and working for me at the same time, but that was back when I knew you were married to your job. Knew I could count on you to put in sixty hours a week, even if you had to do another twenty for your campaign. Ever sinceyou married this Linda woman your work game has been off, Cole. And sure, maybe right now you’ve got this idyllic view of what family life can be, and you think you and Linda will be married forever, but let me tell you something I learned after my second divorce. Wives come and go, but the law lasts forever.”

My mouth practically drops to my steering wheel in dismay. Is he serious? “Lydia,” I spit her name out; my rage is so great that I’m unable to form a longer sentence.

“What?” Harrison’s impatience barks through the phone.

“My wife’s name is Lydia.”

“Okay, Lydia, then. Either way, she’s not important, Cole. Right now, you need to give Ashley a call and make sure you two are on the same page.”

“I’m not going to do that.” My rage has channeled itself into a quiet calm. Quite suddenly, and with blinding clarity, I know what I need to do.

“Enough!” I hear Harrison’s hand slap his desk. “I’m not discussing this with you any further. Call Ashley.”

“Why don’t you call Ashley?” I suggest. “You can tell her she’ll be taking this meeting by herself. I’m bowing out.”

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