Page 26 of This Means War

“What are we doing here?” his mom repeats; her eyes taking in the messy kitchen before fixing on me. Self-consciously I brush Fruit Hoop dust off my tank top. “Honey, we’re here for that retirement party for your father’s college roommate. You knew that; we just talked about it a few weeks ago.” She frowns, displeased.

“Right…Dave Granger, I remember now.” He rakes his hand through his hair. “Just been a lot going on here; must’ve lost track of the date.”

“Apparently so.” She frowns, her eyes still fixed on me. “Who’s your friend?”

“Oh.” Cole looks at me, and I can read the panic in his eyes.

“Mr. and Mrs. Jacobson,” I step forward, extending my hand, unsure why I’m showing Cole mercy right now, “it’s me, Lydia Hamlin, Josh’s little sister.”

“Lydia, oh!” Mrs. Jacobson exclaims in recognition, accepting my hand. Mr. Jacobson still hasn’t said a word. “Look at you all grown up!”

“That I am,” I say with forced cheerfulness.

“And what,” Mr. Jacobson finally breaks his silence, “is the grown-up Lydia Hamlin doing in your kitchen, Cole?”

I’m scrambling around for some excuse other than, I just came over for a food fight, when Cole surprises me. “Actually Dad, Mom,” he pulls me to his side, “I kind of have some big news. Lydia and I got married.”

Silence, complete silence. Cole doesn’t have awall clock, so there’s not even ticking to interfere with the deafening silence that follows this pronouncement.

“I don’t understand,” Mrs. Jacobson finally speaks. “How can you be married? There was no wedding.”

“They eloped, Felicia,” his father growls. “The question is why? What’s your game here, son?”

I’m starting to actually feel comradery and admiration for Cole. He told his parents the truth, and he’s not even cowering under his father’s glare.That’s my man, the unbridled thought gallops across my mind, startling me.

“And what happened to Ashley?” his mom adds, and any affection I was feeling for Cole vanishes.

“Mom,” Cole’s exasperation is clear in his voice, “Ashley and I broke up months ago.”

“Yes, but I never understood why,” she replies, crossing her arms over her chest and once again scanning the chaos of the room. Her gaze settles on me, and I swear her lip curls as she says the next words. “She was such a lovely young woman, and so...put together.”

I would like to interject and say that I usually don’t have Fruit Hoops stuck to my pants, but somehow, I think this goes beyond the cereal mess. The underlying message of their words is loud and clear: Ashley is far better suited to be a politician’s wife. Sadly, I’m pretty sure they’re right.

“Mom,” Cole’s voice is steel, “Lydia is my wife. You are in our house. You’re not going to stand there andinsult her.”

My head moves around so fast I twinge a muscle in my neck. Cole just stood up for me. To his mother. To say I’m shocked is an understatement. Mrs. Jacobson’s eyebrows shoot together and twin pink spots stain her cheeks. It’s Cole’s dad who responds, though.

“Now, now Cole,” his tone is oddly jovial all of the sudden, “no need to get worked up. Your mother didn’t mean to insult anyone. We’re just a little surprised is all, right, Felicia?”

Though her face is still tight with irritation, she nods. “That’s right. Just surprised.”

Okay, what is happening? I can feel tension emanating from all three of them, and yet Mrs. Jacobson is moving towards me, arms opening for a hug.

“Welcome to the family, Lydia,” she intones, as if reading off a script.

“Listen, Lydia,” Cole jumps back in. “Why don’t you go freshen up inourbathroom, my parents can get settled intheirguest room, I’ll clean up here, and we’ll all reconvene in the living room for drinks. How does that sound?”

The meaning behind his words is not lost on me, thanks to his strong emphasis on pronouns and the rooms they correspond with. His parents are staying in the frog room; he expects me to stay in the master suite while they’re here.

“Oh sure,” I agree, but only because he just defended me to them. And also, I figure he and Ican sort out the sleeping arrangements later. I have no intention of sleeping with my husband. I made that mistake once before, and look where it got me. Twins. Two babies.Two!

I race out of there, glad to be away from their distaste. My suitcase is still in the hallway where I abandoned it after finding that hideous frog stuffed animal. I wheel it the rest of the way down the hall to Cole’s room, then sink against the wall, allowing myself a much-needed breather.

Cole’s parents are here! They’re here and very obviously displeased about the news of our marriage. I wonder what they’ll say when they find out that I’m pregnant. Maybe it’ll be another volcanic conversation. One where everything looks calm and peaceful on the outside, but inside there’s lava heating up, preparing to explode out and take everyone down with it. His parents’ lava hasn’t exploded yet, but it has to, right? They can’t just be upset and not say anything about it, can they? My family loves to talk about how upset they are. Sometimes it’sallwe talk about.

Oh, Lydia, if you had only applied yourself more you could’ve gotten into law school.

Lydia, do you have to tell people you’re a middle school running coach? Tell them, you’re applying to grad school or just change the subject if you have to for goodness’ sake.

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