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Steeling my resolve, I inhaled a deep breath, shook my hands out, and tried again, not stopping until I had his shirt open and pushed aside.

“You’re so…” My words broke off and I exhaled heavily, eyes glued to his ripped stomach. I had full permission to touch, to graze my fingertips over the hard planes of his abdominal muscles. And there were muscleseverywhere. He was built like rock. I trailed my fingers down his stomach, watching with fascination as his muscles contracted under my touch.

“I’m so what, Shan?” Johnny asked, voice thick and gruff as he lay sprawled beneath me on the reclined seat, with his hands clamped on my thighs. His hips were thrusting upward in a slow, taunting rhythm as he watched me watch him. “Hmm?” His fingertips traced the edge of my knickers, slipping under the cotton waistband to trail soft circles over my hip bones. “What am I?”

My gaze drifted to his pecs, and then to the trail of dark hair from his belly button that disappeared beneath the waistband of his pants. Muscles and skin. Flesh and heat. That was all I could see. All I couldfeel. He was so big. Soeverything. “Beautiful,” I finally breathed, my gaze flicking back to his. “You’re so beautiful.”

“You’re making this hard for me, Shan.” Sliding his tongue over his bottom lip, he hooked his fingers into the waistband of my knickers and dragged me down on his chest. “I need you tonotlook at me like that.” Burying his face in my hair, he suckled on my neck, drawing a breathy gasp from my throat. “I’m trying to be good here.”

“I’m sorry,” I breathed, arching against him. I was aching for him in parts of my body I had never known existed before he explored, discovered, and claimed. “I just want…” I wasn’t sure what I wanted. All I knew was this boy made everything better; he stopped the tornado of thoughts whirling around in my head, and I needed him to keep doing that.

Maybe I was addicted to him, and maybe it wasn’t healthy—my feelings for him certainly bordered on obsessive—but he was encouraging me with every flex of his hips and every thrust of his tongue, showing me that he wanted this just as badly as I did.

If I was doing this all wrong, Johnny never complained. Instead, he groaned and moaned into my mouth in approval. He started to touch me, slowly at first and then more confidently, brushing the pads of his thumbs over my bare skin. When I felt his hands slide under my knickers, a jolt of excitement shot through me, making my movements more frantic and clumsier. “Is this okay?” He palmed my ass and squeezed tightly. “Do you want me to stop?”

“Don’t stop.” I was painfully aware of the sheer size of him. I was so small in his arms. I was breakable to this boy and it was a troubling thought. He could destroy me in more ways than one. The thing was, I didn’t care what he did to my body so long as he left my heart intact. He could have and take whatever he wanted from me, I would gladly give it all to him so long as I had a promise in blood that he would never hurt me so badly I wouldn’t mend. Because I knew I wouldn’t bounce back from this. Fromhim. Curling my arms around his neck, I pressed my lips to his and choked out, “Don’t ever stop.”

Breathing hard, he sat straight up and roughly dragged me closer, causing us both to groan when our bodies aligned in the best possible way. “I love you,” he whispered. “And I want you—badly. But I just… I don’t want to do anything to fuck this up,” he added, tone deep and gravelly. “I can’t mess this up, Shan. I need this.” Exhaling a ragged breath, he pressed his forehead to mine. “I meant it when I said I need you for keeps.”

“You remember saying that?”

He nodded slowly. “I remember.”

The air left my lungs in a sudden rush. “Good.”

“I’m going to keep you,” he whispered and his hot breath fanned my face. “If that’s okay?”

“That’s definitely okay,” I breathed, pressing my hand to his cheek. “I want you to keep me.”

He smiled, dimples deepening. “Thank fuck for that.”

Pressing a kiss to the curve of his swollen lips, I whispered, “I’ll keep you, too.”

“Jesus.” Shuddering, he dropped his head in the curve of my neck and groaned. “This is how I’m going to die” was his muffled response and it caused me to laugh. “Think it’s funny?” he teased, lifting his head up to grin at me. “I’ll be taking you with me.”

God, I really hope you do…

“But for now, I’d better take you home,” he said with a resigned sigh. “Or else your ma will have the Gards out looking for us.”

“Oh.” My heart plummeted into my stomach and my hold on his neck tightened. “Okay.”

“It’s going to be okay,” he coaxed, blue eyes locked on mine. “Whatever happens with your da,you’regoing to be okay.”

No, I wasn’t, but I forced a smile for his sake. “I know.”

“Because you’re not on your own anymore,” he whispered, wrapping me up in his arms so tightly that I didn’t care that I couldn’t breathe. I wanted the world to stop and let us both off because this, right here, was where I wanted to be—where I wanted tostay. “You have friends,” he continued to whisper. “And you have me.”

His words gave me more comfort than I knew what to do with. He was big and strong and dangerously powerful. Given the chance, he could do some serious physical damage to my body. And still I wasn’t fearful. I wasn’twary. I didn’t have a hint of fear in my body.

“I’m on your team,” he added huskily. “Do you get that? I’m totally with you, Shannon Lynch. One call, that’s all you need to make, and I’ll come. I won’t let you down, and I won’t leave you alone in this. I promise.”

“It’s just weird for me because I’ve never had someone in my corner before.” Shivering, I added, “Not someone like you.”

“I’m not in your corner, Shannon,” Johnny replied in a gruff tone. “I’m standing right beside you.”

Oh god.

His words hit me deep. Burying my face in his chest, I curled myself into the smallest ball I could and prayed for time to stand still just for a little while. “I bet you wish you had a normal girlfriend.”

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