Page 48 of Keeping 13

None of that consoled me because my entire focus was onShannon.

Because of my father and his anal attitude toward upholding the law, I hadn’t been able to see her. Apparently, Shannon’s brother Darren had called my parents, making it clear in no uncertain terms that I wasn’t to return to the hospital. I understood that my father dealt with this kind of thing on a daily basis; he was used to watching dysfunction unfold around him, but I wasn’t. This was personal for me—shewas personal for me—and being kept in the dark was driving me insane.

My mother, the turncoat, was on my father’s side, but she had her own agenda. She didn’t want me going anywhere near Mrs. Lynch. Her back was up over the whole suspension threat, and she didn’t want me going next to nor neara woman like that—her words, not mine.

Because of my inability to get myself from A to B since my surgery, I couldn’t get there without my parents’ help, leaving me pissed off and car-less. Betrayed and sulking, I remained in bed for most of the week, ignoring my mother every time she popped her head around the door to check on me—which happened to be every twenty bleeding minutes—and mulling in my bad mood. I was smothering inside my house. Fucking losing my mind with the restlessness inside of my body. I wasn’t used to sitting still and doing nothing. I was cranky and on edge, driven deeper into my own head with every passing day and no word from Shannon.

By the following Monday, I was resigned to my bad mood. After an intense physiotherapy session with Janice that morning, followed by a further two hours in the pool, I was depressed and agitated. On the flat of my back, with Sookie tucked at my side, I wasted the rest of the day tossing a rugby ball into the air and catching it, all the while contemplating the worst possible scenarios that had been relentlessly plaguing me.

What if Shannon’s dad came back and he didn’t get prosecuted?

What if my body didn’t heal in time for the tour?

What if he came back and her mother took him back?

What if the coaches overlooked me for that Danny Miller kid from Galway?

What if she didn’t come back to school next week?

What if this was it for me?

What if she was put into care and had to change schools?

What if I’d played my last game in Dublin?

What if she got hurt again?

What if, what if, what if…

“I should have kept her in this room with us, Sook,” I muttered. “I should have kept her, period!”

My faithful Labrador’s response was to nuzzle into my side and yodel softly.

“Yeah, I know, baby.” Exhaling heavily, I tossed the ball across the room and wrapped my arm around her. “I fucked up real bad.”

“Johnny, something’s come up and Dad’s had to go back to Dublin.” Mam’s voice filled the room moments before she arrived in my doorway. “Cillian called—you remember Cillian, don’t you, love? Cillian Moore?”

One of the bloodthirsty solicitors who worked under my father? “Yeah, I remember him.”Hotshot little fucker.

“Well, there’s been some issue with a client’s bail hearing and your dad needs to be there to clear it up. Cillian was handling the case, but something’s popped up and your father is on better terms with Judge O’Leary.”

I snorted loudly. “Glad to know where his priorities lie. As usual.”

“Don’t be like that,” Mam said with a sigh. “He spent half the night on the phone last night—again—calling around for your benefit.”

Arching a brow, I leveled her with a stare. “And?”

“And nothing,” Mam replied. “He’s not at liberty to discuss anything he found out with us—if he even found anything out.” She sighed again. “You know all of this, Johnny.”

Not bothering to respond, I turned my glare to the ceiling above me.

“He left some paperwork in his study and I need to drop it up to him,” Mam continued to say. “I’ll only be a few hours—I’ll definitely be back tonight, but just in case, I’ve called Gerard to come over and keep you company while I’m gone. He knows you’re not to leave the house, love, so don’t even try and coax him into doing the wrong thing or there will be consequences for the both of you.”

My ears perked up at the sound of Gibsie’s name, and instantly, I was plotting mutiny. I cared about a grand total of two things in my life. Rugby and Shannon. And right now, both had been taken away from me without warning. I was losing control of the reins of my own life and it was making me crazy. What the fuck was I supposed to do? Stay in my bed and take my medicine like a good little boy with a broken dick?I think fucking not.

“Stay in bed,” Mam added sternly. “Gerard can let himself in, so don’t trouble yourself with the stairs, love. And I know you said you’re not hungry, but there’s a pot of soup on the stove and some fresh bread rolls on the table if you’re feeling peckish later.”

Yeah, my mother might not have gotten the pram she wanted with my discharge papers from the hospital, but she had gained more control over my life than she’d had in years and she was exercising that newfound power. I was out of commission and she was thrilled to have me under her maternal watch 24/7.

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