Page 96 of The Idiot

“Yeah?”

Now, what’s wrong? Why is he looking at me like he broke something?

“I want this. Really, I do.”

And just like that, he surprises me again, my heart clenching. Brushing my thumb under the shell of his lower lip, I hope he can see my sincerity.

“It would be fine if you didn’t. You know that, right?”

“I know. That’s why I want it. You’re… just the perfect person. Forme. Theonlyperson. You always have been. And we’re lucky, you know? We got to be best friends our entire lives, and now we get to love each other forever. So, it’s kind ofstupid that I was afraid. How can you be afraid of something when you love someone as much as I love you?”

Have I always been a crier? Wrapping my arms around him, I squeeze tight, grateful I never have to do without him. It’s terrifying when life gives you everything you ever wanted.

“And, I mean, I’ve had my dick in you dozens of times now,” he continues, “and mine’s a little bit bigger than yours, andyou’refine, so… Yours shouldprobablyfit. Right?”

Fucking Jesse.

Leaning back, I nod. You can’t argue with that logic, really. And if it makes him less anxious, so be it.

“Yeah. Definitely.”

Smiling, he lets out a little breath of relief, like he’s got the final reassurance he needed.

“Okay.” He nods, rising.

Maneuvering me, he brings my tip to his hole. Eyes fixed on mine, I’ve never seen him look so focused. I hope I remember every detail of this day until I die. He’s so damn gorgeous. When his lips press together, I know he’s pushing out against me like I explained to him last week.

His silky insides greet me as I slip through his ring. Fuck. The pressure already.

I don’t dare move a muscle, though, or make a sound. I’m too busy gauging his facial expressions.

Brows knitting, that knowing look of confusion washes over his face. I wait; wait for his tension to ease, for the burn to fade into sweet relief, but his features morph into discomfort as he tries to take more of me in.

His eyes slam shut. His fingers dig into my shoulders.

“Oh, God,” he lets out in an unholy pitch. “I was wrong!You’rebigger.Waybigger!”

Fuck. He’s not comfortable.

“Jesse, stop,” I warn, clutching his hips tighter. “We don’t have to.”

His nostrils flare and his throat undulates like he’s meditating. “No. I can do it,” he grits, shaking his head. “Just… thinksmall, okay?”

“What? Likewillmy dick to be smaller?”

“Yeah. You love me, don’t you?” His rationale comes out half panicky, half determined.

Holy shit. He’s serious.

I’m not about to tell him I can’t magically change the girth of my dick, but it’s obvious his stubborn ass isn’t going to give up. Literally. I can do one thing, though.

Lunging for his mouth, I invade it with deep sweeps of my tongue. I dig into his silly jockstrap and find what else I can distract him with, wrapping my hand around him.

Kissing and stroking him, I don’t let up. His whimpers of hesitation soon turn to moans, and his body relaxes around me.

Pretty soon, I’m moaning along with him. His heat is slowly engulfing me, sheathing me little by little. It’s breathtaking and profound in ways I’ve never equated to sex. I havemy person.

His cheeks touch down on the tops of my thighs, his cool skin kissing mine.

---