Page 112 of Our Deceptive Heat

“Ryn, oh, please. Where are you?”

When I can’t find her, when I know she’s gone, I run towards the village, and when I can’t find her there; I go to the jetty, then I check the hotel.

I search until well after the sun sets, until my feet ache and my whole body trembles.

But Ryn is gone.

If she was even here.

Perhaps it was only in my mind because I wanted to see her so much.

Perhaps she was just a projection of a desperately broken man.

Either way, we aren’t leaving.

There’s something here. Maybe it’s her, maybe it’s not, but I’m not risking it.

If Ryn is here, then I will find her.

Chapter thirty-five

Ryn

I’ll save my damnself- Ryn Raines

The alpha smiles and leans forward, patting my hand in a gesture that is both harmless and far too forward. I pull my hand away and try to ignore the way he holds my gaze. His name is Miles, and he’s pushing too hard.

Everything about him is wrong. I don’t like his scent of orange and treacle; and I really don’t like the way he’s touching me. I lean back in the uncomfortable chair, pick up my fruity drink, and fiddle with the overly large straw just so I have something to do with my hands.

This is paradise, a perfect island of green forests to discover secret wonders in, surrounded by the bluest of oceans and the whitest sands. The hotel I’m staying in is beautiful. I just can’t feel the beauty. Everything is dull, and the threat of my father feels just out of sight.

In two days, Kelly is going to the next competition. The alpha he’d introduced me to yesterday had smiled at me and politely asked if we could be friends. Kelly had been furious until I’d agreed.

But this is the twelfth date. I’ve been trying to find a pack to take me on. I can’t keep pushing my heats back. The last time, I sat alone in a room for a week with a dildo and cried as I tried to get my body to accept the silicone instead of the real thing.

I’m running out of time. Either I will be found by my father or a pack will take me. All those precious choices I fought for will vanish.

“Did you hear Fate’s Choice, that famous band, is here?”

I jerk back to reality with an audible tear. “I’m sorry. Can you repeat that?”

I don’t realise I’ve reached out and have hold of the alpha’s shorts until he looks down at my hand. I let go, and he frowns.

“Fate’s Choice is here vacationing.”

“Are you sure?”

“Hard to miss them.” He pulls out his phone and shows me a picture of Tyr walking on the beach. Envy is standing at the cliff tops. Mako is sitting at a table not far from here. I lift my eyes and search, but he’s not there. The photo must be old, but how old?

The same burning anger resurfaces. It’s been a bitterly cold weight that’s been keeping me company so long it feels like an old friend.

“Thanks,” I mutter, standing up. “I have to go, I’m sorry, Alpha…” I trail off, unable to recall his name. “I have to go.”

“But wait-”

I don’t, though, I just twirl away and rush through the crowd.

My panic has me rushing with no aim, no purpose. It’s not until I find myself up on the cliffs, watching the waves crash against the rocks, that I calm and start thinking about this logically.