Page 97 of Just One Fake Date

“True. He was cute. Like a little teddy bear. He followed me around, even though I didn’t want him to. He never cried and he never complained. He just rolled with whatever was happening.”

“Sounds like he hasn’t changed much.”

“No. He’s a lot taller and he eats more, but his character is exactly the same. I have to wonder what he’d be like if he ever found anything he really cared about.” She frowned at her meal and Ty thought she wouldn’t say any more.

But Shannyn spoke again, surprising him both by the quiet heat of her words and the fact that she was admitting more. “My biological mother left the hospital without me,” she said softly. “I don’t know anything about her and I don’t want to. I went straight into foster care and was always being moved to another family, another home.” She impaled him with a glance. “You probably don’t know that a lot of foster kids carry their few possessions around in garbage bags.”

Ty hadn’t known that. He was startled and he was sure it showed, because Shannyn nodded wearily.

“Even for a little kid, it’s hard to miss the connection. Nobody wanted me. Nobody cared. I wasn’t wanted, much less loved, and I didn’t deserve to be. I might as well have crawled into that bag myself.” She swallowed. “So I was bad. I ran away and I talked back and I defied everyone who tried to help me.”

He didn’t make any comments about feral cats. “You had nothing to lose.”

“No wonder they didn’t want me. I made sure of it.”

It wasn’t hard to imagine her being provocative. “Because you were afraid,” Ty guessed quietly.

“I think I was furious, actually. And when I was five, they brought Aidan to the foster home where I was staying. Like I said, I hated him on sight. Not only was he adorable, but he was so easygoing. He was always being held up as an example, especially for trouble like me. Of course. I acted out even more. I was punished by my foster parents but it made no difference. They didn’t know what to do with me. I probably drove them crazy.”

Ty could understand that reaction.

Shannyn paid close attention to her plate as she pushed around her chicken. Ty didn’t want to say anything in case she stopped talking. He was transfixed, and astonished that her history could be so different from his own.

Never mind that someone so strong and creative could have such a background.

“And then my parents came. Not my biological parents, my mom and dad. They came to see Aidan, because they wanted to adopt a boy, and he was beautiful. I was so jealous.” Shannyn shook her head and Ty saw the shimmer of tears in her eyes. “I broke something in a tantrum and ran to hide in my room. I knew that he was going to get a family and I wasn’t. I smashed a few more things there but I really wanted to hurt him.” She took a breath but it caught and her next words were husky. “It just wasn’t fair.”

No, it wasn’t fair. Ty couldn’t imagine why anyone would give her up.

Shannyn’s throat worked for a moment. It was as if she couldn’t stop telling the story once she’d started, like she’d uncorked a bottle and had to pour it out until it was empty. She shook her head and her tears fell, the sight killing Ty. She didn’t even try to stop them. Maybe she didn’t know they were falling.

She was reliving that devastation and there was nothing Ty could do. He couldn’t charge in and fix this. He couldn’t even console her because if he reached out, she might realize how much she was confessing and stop talking.

All he could do was listen and it was the hardest thing he’d ever done.

He should be getting used to Shannyn demanding all he had to give and a little bit more.

“But that’s not what happened,” she whispered. “She came to me, the woman who would become my mom, and she talked to me. She was so nice, even though I wasn’t. She asked to meet my doll, the only one I had, which surprised me. My doll was dirty and scuffed up, but my most prized possession. Maybe my only one. Maybe she caught me in a weak moment because I showed her the doll. She straightened her clothes carefully as I watched, as if my doll was beautiful.”

Ty watched her tears well again.

“She combed her hair, then went to get her own purse. I was fascinated that she had a little sewing kit in there and came closer to watch. She replaced a button on my doll’s dress and mended the hem, talking to me all the time. She didn’t wait for an answer. She just talked, explaining to me how to sew on a button, how to knot the thread, how to make little stitches. And when she was done, she gave me back my doll. My doll looked so much better. I loved her but I hadn’t taken care of her and that shocked me a little.”

Shannyn took an uneven breath. “Then my mom asked if she could comb my hair and I let her, even though I always fought anyone who wanted to touch me. She straightened my clothes and sewed a tear in my pocket, talking quietly all the while. She was so gentle. I felt like someone cared, for the very first time I could remember. I liked having my hair combed and my clothes straightened. I liked feeling as if I mattered, just a little bit to somebody. When she asked if I wanted to come and live with them, I cried. She picked me up and hugged me, then carried me and my doll right out of there.”

“They adopted you both,” Ty guessed.

“They had to foster us first, and I was bad. I was so afraid to believe that anything good was happening.”

“If it was going to go south, you’d rather it happened sooner.”

“I guess so. It seemed like I couldn’t stop myself, but she never yelled at me. She worried about me when I ran off, and they came looking for me, and they always hugged me when I came back. I had a room with pretty things and clean clothes and I had a little suitcase instead of a trash bag. My doll got a new wardrobe, too, and gradually, I started to trust that I had a home. I even began to get along with Aidan.”

Ty smiled at that and she flicked a glance his way. “I hear a but,” he said.

Shannyn nodded and sobered. “My dad died. It was very sudden. He had an aneurysm at work. He just went to work one Tuesday morning and never came home again. My mom was devastated. They were very much in love. We’d only been there a few years and I figured that was the writing on the wall.”

“The other shoe was dropping.”

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