Page 18 of My Crush's Brother

I push her hair off her forehead, “I guess we’ll just have to practice more.” I say before kissing my way down her body before devouring her again.

ELEVEN

Pearl

“What happened with you and Tracey?” I run my finger softly over Blake’s chest as he stares up at the ceiling. He lets out a long sigh before answering. “And don’t me that vague version.”

“We met after I moved back here from college. I was too ashamed to move back to Grand Lake so I went to Denver instead. I met her and we hit it off...wasn’t anything serious back then, just a casual hookup now and then. After a few months my dad got sick so I moved back to Grand Lake and she moved on with some other guy. She’s a city girl and I didn’t expect anything from her but we stayed friends.”

He stops for a brief moment as if he’s remembering that time in his life. It was rough when Mr. Winthrop got sick, it seemed like one day he was fine and a week later he was diagnosed with stage four pancreatic cancer.

“Over the years we’d hang out, usually between relationships. Finally, she said she wanted something more and it just kind of happened. She said she was willing to move here to be with me since I was helping my mom with the cabins and starting my own company. So we lived here for a few years before I proposed and then about a year ago...I woke up one morning to the ring onher pillow and a note that said she missed her life in Denver and she was tired of waiting around for me since I travel for work so much. And that was it.”

The room is so quiet, I’m not sure what to say. “I’m so sorry Blake, that was a really shitty thing for her to do.” I say propping myself up on my elbow to look at him.

“Nah, she had to do what was best for her.” He doesn’t look at me, just runs his hand up and down my naked back.

A small sliver of moonlight peeking through the curtains is the only light in the room. “Do you still love her?” I don’t know what prompts me to ask that. I’m not sure I want to know the answer either.

“No,” he says before turning to look at me. “It’s okay that you’re still in love with Trevor, I’m not disillusioned to what this is.” He says without breaking eye contact.

My breath catches in my throat and a small pain shoots through my chest. I smile and nod, playing it off. I thought I’d made it clear to him last night that it’s not Trevor that I want.

“And what is this?” I ask coyly motioning between us. “Young virgin gets seduced by gruff mountain man who teaches her how to be with a man?” I say giggling, trying to lighten the mood.

He looks at me for what feels like minutes even though I know it’s only a few seconds and for the briefest moment I feel like he wants more and I silently pray he asks me for more. “Yeah, something like that. I mean, you know my track record. Not exactly boyfriend of the year material.”

He gets up and heads to the bathroom. I can hear the shower running as I slowly drift off to sleep.

It’s beenfour days since I slept with Blake and I haven’t heard a word from him. The morning after wasn’t exactly what I had imagined my first time would be like either. No pancakes or eggs, just a note from him that he had to run some errands and that I could stay as long as I liked.

“Have you heard anything about that job?” Jade asks as I sip my latte. We have a standing date every other Sunday. We grab lattes and Noodle, Jade’s mini Aussie and head out for a sunrise hike in the Rocky Mountains.

“Nothing since the initial email response about setting up a phone interview. The lady who messaged me said she was going to be out of the office but she’s back on Monday so she’ll reach out then. Am I crazy? I mean...this is home.”

“Pearl I think you’d be crazy to not get try something new. Yes this is home and it’s always going to be here. So, if this job in Chicago doesn’t work out or you get there and hate it then home will still be here. I just don’t want to see you sell yourself short by not even trying.”

Blake’s face keeps swirling in my head, what even am I to him? Why do I keep thinking about him and feeling guilty when I imagine a life for myself in Chicago?

“I slept with Blake.”

“WHAT?” Jade spins so fast she loses her balance and flings her latte off the side of the mountain.

“Shit!” I yell reaching out to catch her hand and steady her.

“You cannot tell me news like that when I could fall to my death!” She shouts motioning to the ledge a good twenty feetaway. We both burst out in laughter as Noodle bounds up to us curious about the excitement.

“Okay, let's take a seat over here. I need a minute to process this.” She says pouring some water in a portable bowl for Noodle. “Tell. Me. Everything.”

I explain to her without any explicit details about how it all went down, “But, I haven’t heard from him since.”

“Wait hold up. He took your virginity and just bailed?” I can see the fire start to burn in her eyes.

“No, we didn’t have any expectations or anything and he thinks I’m still in love with Trevor and I’m pretty sure he’s still in love with Tracey. I saw him yesterday at the cabins in passing but I’ve noticed he hasn’t been to The Place at all this week and that’s not like him. I think he’s avoiding me.”

“Here’s my advice and two cents. First, you’re both adults so just say how you feel so there’s no miscommunication and second, if you both feel the same way then go for it. If you both just want it to be casual then don’t feel like it needs to be more than that. He’s your first Pearl, enjoy it...until you don’t or whatever.” I bump her shoulder and nod my head.

“You know you’re always right?”

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