Page 14 of My Crush's Brother

“Ah, you’ve got the wrong brother.” I say tipping my fresh beer bottle at her.

“Come on, be a sport. You know you’ve grown to loooove having me around.” She pokes at my belly until I finally give in.

Of course, as soon as I place my hand over hers and slip my hand around her waist the song changes. The band starts to play, Bob Dylan’sMake You Feel My Love. I pull her in nervously toward me, she doesn’t hesitate pressing herself against me. I will my heart to not race and regulate my breathing before it gives away my nervousness. I can smell the slight hint of strawberry from her lips, my eyes dart to look at her long, slender neck. I can see her pulse beating rapidly, I want to think it’s because I excite her but in reality, I still make her nervous.

Neither of us speak as the song plays on and our bodies sway with the music. I press my hand a little harder against her lower back and I hear her inhale a little sharper. Her body feels right against mine, like she belongs in my arms. Instead of shaking my head clear from the thoughts I let them linger. I let myself wonder what it would be like to pull back and kiss her. To thread my fingers through her beautiful strawberry blonde curls and tell her exactly how I fell.

The song ends and the clapping around me wakes me out of my fantasy. I pull back, putting distance between us just as my phone starts to vibrate in my pocket. I pull it out, answering it without looking at the screen as I head out into the night air to clear my head.

“Hello?”

“Hello? Blake? It’s...it’s Tracey.”

NINE

Pearl

Istand at the edge of the dance floor, my body feeling empty the moment he pulled away. I see him pull his phone from his pocket and answer it before heading outside. I want to follow him but I turn back around and head towards the bar.

“Am I seeing things or did you and Blake Winthrop just have a moment?” Jade is standing beside me with her hand on her chest in mock shock.

“What? No, he’s just...I don’t know. I kind of thought I felt something but then he walked off like it was nothing.”

“There was some serious heat there, you did not imagine that.” She fans herself, “This whole place is about to be pregnant.”

I slap her arm, “Stop it! You’re embarrassing me. And I told you that I had the tiniest crush on him in confidence, it doesn’t mean anything. He’s attractive, the entire town knows and admits that, I’m just a late bloomer on the matter.”

“Well if anything ever happens between you two, I want details. Moment by moment, play by play details.” She claps through the statement for emphasis.

I glance outside and see a slight silhouette of Blake. His arms are propped on the top of the fence and he looks like he’s offthe phone. Now’s my chance to go tell him that I have decided to move on from Trevor. I don’t know what I expect him to say about the matter but it’s my attempt to let him know where I stand.

“I’m going to get some fresh air, I’ll be back in a few.” I make a beeline before Jade can offer to come with me.

“Hey,” I walk up next to him and place my hand on the top of the fence. “You okay? You seemed like you got a little spooked or something.”

“Hmm?” He turns and gives me a brief look, “Yeah, it was nothing. Just needed some fresh air. That place is packed.” He nods toward the barn.

We both stare up at the night sky, the stars twinkling like diamonds against an inky canvas. That’s something you don’t get in the city, the vast expanse of night sky. I don’t know what comes over me but I decide to try and get to know Blake.

“So what’s your story?” He seems a bit confused.

“My story? You know, you practically grew up in my house.”

“Well, I saw you around a lot sure, but...what happened with the football thing?” I can see his jaw tense, normally that would have scared me away but I feel like I’m slowly breaking down his barriers.

His rubs at the ever present scruff on his chin, as if he was thinking through what he wants to say.

“Not much to say I ‘spose. I had a full ride to Florida but end up getting an injury my junior year that shot it all to hell.” He absentmindedly rubs his shoulder.

“Is that where you were injured?”

“Yup. Kind of a career ending injury when you’re the center and the quarterback relies on your to snap the ball to him.”

I don’t say anything else, it feels like he has more to say so I just sit in silence until he feels comfortable.

“I couldn’t afford to stay in school after the accident and my parents couldn’t help out, at least not enough to cover my surgery and rehab and pay for school. So I had to drop out, came back here and the rest is history.”

“I’m sorry.” I know it’s not my fault but I’m not sure what else to say in the situation. I can tell he’s still angry at what happened. Who knows where he’d be if he hadn’t been injured. He’d probably be living the good life playing in the NFL. The silence hangs heavy between us.

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