Page 25 of Orri

Ulfar scoffs. He's not buying that either. "Sure. So you're telling me you spent the last few weeks fucking the daylights out of anomega, of all things, and you're still this wound up? Man, I would say you need to get laid, but clearly that didn't help. At all.”

I round on him, suddenly ablaze with emotion. "I would think you of all people would understand!" My hands ball into fists. My voice breaks. "I loved your sister, Ulfar. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. And that was stolen from me, because I couldn't keep my promise. I couldn't protect her when she needed it most. Now here I am whoring myself out to some random female just to feel something again...I don't know what's wrong with me." I bury my face in my hands and let out a groan. "If she was here..."

"If she was here," Ulfar finishes, and his tone is crystal clear, leaving no room for argument. "Then she'd tell you what a fool you're being."

The words hit me like a slap to the face. "How dare you—" My heart's in my throat and fuck it, I don't care if he's my superior, he's gonna pay for that.

"I know my sister, Orri!" His authority looms over me, as if saying 'try me.' "I spent a lot longer with her than you did. You don't think I know my own blood?" His eyes meet mine, and I have to admit that he is right.

I huff out a breath, and after a few heated moments, reason wins out. Maybe Ihavebeen blind all this time.

"There's something I need to tell you," Ulfar says. "Something I should have told you a long time ago. I mourned Zannah in my own way, and it didn't feel proper at the time, but..." He shook his head, grimacing. "She came to me, once. Talking about you. Not long before she passed, actually." He rubs the back of his neck and looks away, but presses on. "You thought she was your heart-mate, right?"

A heavy stone of dread drops into my heart and doesn't leave. My mouth goes dry. It's something I always suspected in the darkest regions of my heart, but never wanted to admit...

"She wasn't, Orri." The words seem to echo forever until they fill up every void. "She wasn't your heart-mate. She didn't know how to tell you." He swallows, then puts a hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry."

Zannah wasn't my heart-mate.The carefully constructed worldview I had, everything I stood for, shatters in an instant. Everything I did — or didn't do, in the case of Isabella — was to honor Zannah's memory and the once-in-a-lifetime connection we had.

Correction: connection Ithoughtwe had.

I really was a fool.

"I'm sorry to have to tell you like this," Ulfar says again, and it actually sounds like he means it. "But no one else was going to." He stretches his arms over his head, leaning back in the chair. "It's tough being an alpha sometimes, huh? No one ever wants to call you out when you're wrong."

Wrong. The word tastes so foreign on my lips. My feelings for Zannah were real, but the fantasy of us being heart-mates, of being together forever...

It was only that. A fantasy. And if that was true, then...

"Zannah wouldn't want you to throw away your chance at happiness," Ulfar says, and for the first time, I almost believe him. "And you know as well as I do, she'd be the first person to smack you upside the head for thinking that you were insulting her by finding someone else."

I don't know what to say. My mouth opens and closes, but no words come out. It's like everything inside me's being torn apart and put back together at the same time.

"I know you loved Zannah very much," Ulfar continues. "So did I. And I still miss her every damn day. But she's gone, Orri. As much as it hurts to hear that, she's gone. And it's up to us to make the best life we can. Living in a way that she would be proud of."

I guess I never really thought about it that way. Could I really let go of so many years of grief and guilt? It wouldn't be easy. But when I think about Isabella's smile, or the way she looked at me when she confessed her feelings...

Maybe I have it in me to try.

"This girl," Ulfar says after a long moment. "Do you care for her? Truly?"

That's a loaded question if I ever heard one. But with clear eyes I now see the truth. "Yes. I do."

Ulfar gives me a knowing smile. "Then you know what you have to do." He gets up, but not before giving me another reassuring pat on the back. "It's okay to let her go, Orri. It's time to live your life." And with that, he turns and walks away, leaving the door open behind him.

I sit there for a few moments longer, contemplating over my empty glass. Now that no one's here to see, tears spring up at the edges of my eyes. Everything I thought I had. Everything I thought I stood for.

With a sniff, I drew myself up onto my feet.

It was time to turn over a new leaf.

And that would start by winning Isabella back. I had to tell her how I felt, once and for all. ISA match or not. Because I can't bear to live another life full of regrets.

NEW ARRIVAL

ISABELLA

I'm fine. Really, I'm fine.