Page 20 of Mated to the Pride

Jessica

The North boys seemed to have noticed that something was wrong with me, and they were all being characteristically kind — but frankly, their sweetness only made me feel worse. Not only had I slept with Preston while harboring a crush on all four of them, but now I had also slept with Blake. It was probably only a matter of time before they found out, and it would hurt them.

And it would all be my fault.

This wasn’t something I had ever done before. Ordinarily I felt bad about dating several guys at once; I had certainly never slept with two close best friends like this. The fact that it was only a matter of days apart didn’t make me feel any better. Even at the time, however, I felt I couldn’t control myself. In the moment, it felt like the most right and natural thing in the world to fall into Blake — just like it had been with Preston. Now that I was in my own mind and away from the heat of the moment, it seemed insane, but at the time I recalled a feeling of purpose. A depth of emotion that I shouldn’t be experiencing so soon after I had met these men.

Physically, I could have pulled myself away, but I didn’t wanted to. Not in the least. Not in either case.

Even now, looking back as I finished up with my skincare routine, I couldn’t look my reflection in the eyes and honestly say I regretted it. It was bizarre, and I hated myself for it. I had always believed I was a better person than this, and now here I was risking pain for these guys that I adored so much. Now here I was, melting at the seams the second their handsome smiles landed on me.

Speaking of the devil — in the mirror reflection, I caught sight of Stone hovering at my open door. I met his eyes and smiled as he knocked on the frame.

“Hey,” I said, trying to iron out any sadness or frustration in my voice. Sure, they had already worked out that something was wrong with me, but I had no intention of making it any more obvious. “You’re lucky. You just missed seeing the green face mask.”

“Sounds pretty unlucky to me,” he reasoned, stepping in. “You got a couple of minutes?”

“For you?” I said. “Sure. You can have exactly 120 seconds.”

His grin twitched at the corner, lopsided, and he took a seat on the edge of the bathtub. “I guess that’ll be enough. I just… kind of wanted to check in on you. Make sure you were doing okay.”

Subtle, I thought. Still, it was a kind gesture. I wasn’t about to scare him off for daring to care about me. “I’m fine,” I said. “Just doing my skincare.”

“Yeah, I meant in a more general sense than… the present thirty seconds.”

I looked over my shoulder to meet him in the eyes head on, not just in the reflection. Those brown eyes were so warm and sincere that it was difficult not to spill out every welled-up feeling I had, but I knew that was a recipe for disaster. I forced myself to turn back to my own reflection, and hoped that my smile wasn’t as obviously fake to Stone as it was to me. “Well. I have a good relationship with my family. I have plenty of friends. Ididjust quit my job to come and work with you guys on a whim, so thatmightbe a sign of some kind of mental break…”

“You seem like you’re having a hard time with something,” said Stone, tone blunt but fond. “I can see you’re dodging me, so I won’t push. But if youdowant to talk about whatever it is, I hope you know I’m here.”

“You’re very sweet,” I said, and meant it. The next part, not so much. “If I seemed off today, it’s probably that I’ve had a headache.”

“You have?” he said. I hadn’t known Stone very long, but I already recognized the playful sarcasm. Clearly, he didn’t believe me in the slightest. “Well, that’s no good. Let me get you a Tylenol.”

“No, I-”

“You can’t just struggle through with a headache,” he said, standing up from the bath. He held up his hands. “You leave me with no choice but to get off my ass and walk all the way to my medicine cabinet, and then to the kitchen to get you something to wash it down with.”

“Stone.”

“Look at all this effort I’m going to do on your behalf.”

“Oh, stop.” I couldn’t fight the smile off my face any longer, and swatted at his arm with my hand. “Alright, alright. But you’re right. I am dodging you, and I don’t want to talk about it.”

His triumphant smile softened, and he nodded. “Not the kind of thing I like being right about. Look, whatever it is. If there’s anything I can do to help you, will you just promise to tell me? Doesn’t matter what it is.”

I don’t know, Stone. Can you reach into the past and slap my hands away from your teammates?

“If you’ve got a magic pill to wash away stress,” I said instead, “that would be nice.”

He held up a finger. There was something light in his eyes, and right away I wondered what I’d triggered. “Hold on,” he said. “Wait here.”

“Stone, I was joking.”

“Wait here!” he called back, already half-jogging out of the room. It dragged another weary smile back onto my face, and I turned back to the mirror to check that all my face cream was absorbed. Finding no issues, I headed back to my bedroom, and saw Stone returning with a small bottle in his hand.

“I really don’t need-”

“Doctor’s orders,” said Stone, voice cheery, and tossed the little glass bottle to me. “This is lavender oil. Two drops on your pillow. Perfect for some restful sleep.”

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