Page 42 of If Tomorrow Never Comes

“I have no idea. I couldn’t look at him. They’d just asked me to describe the guy when you called.” She dropped her forehead to the steering wheel. “This is a fucking disaster.”

“It’s not great,” Yuka agreed. “But let’s look at this objectively. You were both there that night; you know how good it was. The conversation, the connection, the erotic kiss—”

“We agreed to strike ‘erotic’!”

“We most certainly did not. Anyway, all I’m saying is it shouldn’t come as a surprise to him that you were still thinking about it in the days right after. Especially with what you were going through, you know? I’d be shocked as hell if he hadn’t felt the same way.”

“We’ll never know because I’ll never ask him. Because he has a girlfriend. Who, as it turns out, saved my life. Which is why this is all so disastrous to come out now, and in front of them, no less.”

“Well. Yeah. That part is pretty awful.”

“What if someone figures it out and tells Carly?”

“How would they? Jamie’s the only one who knows, right?”

“Hell if I know. That group seems more Carly’s than his ... He sort of sticks near her and doesn’t talk to the others too much. So I doubt he’s close enough with any of them to have told them what happened. But I could be wrong, and it’s possible someone knows and will put it together.”

“But you said Jamie and Carly weren’t together back then, right? Why would it be so bad?”

“Because we’ve been lying to her by pretending we’ve never met this entire time!”

“Right.” Another pause. “So tell her. Come clean.”

“I can’t. Not now. It’s too late, and I’m not sure it’s my place to do that without Jamie on board. I just ... I don’t want to hurt Carly.”

“Yeah, okay.” Yuka hummed thoughtfully. “We also don’t want to make her mad after she promoted the hell out of your business.”

Elliott stilled for a beat. She hadn’t even thought about that. If Carly suddenly had a reason to hate Elliott, she had the capacity to make a lot of other people hate her, too. Like @ChantalPlans, and every person Chantal could introduce Elliott to.

She wished she could say she didn’t care about that part and that the only thing that mattered was being a good friend to the woman who’d given so selflessly to a stranger, but she couldn’t ignore the fact the career she wanted was just within reach. “This is just ...” She crossed her arms over her head and groaned. “I’m a terrible person.”

“Don’t talk like that. You’ve been put in a difficult position, and you’re handling it as well as you can. There’s no perfect way to maneuver these things, okay? You did nothing wrong, except maybe not coming clean about meeting Jamie before, but even that’s sticky at this point. You’ve got Carly’s best interests at heart, and that’s what matters.”

She closed her eyes, suddenly exhausted. “It doesn’t feel like enough.”

“What you need is to go home, pour yourself a glass of wine, and binge someLove Is Blind. Okay? Give yourself a little time to shut off.”

“When have I ever been able to shut anything off?”

“I was hoping it was something new we could try. You know, with the fresh start and all.”

Elliott snorted. “Some fresh start. You know, I really thought I could do this—be friends with Carly and her friends, including Jamie. Work with his sister, too. But now I just ... I don’t know. Maybe I should give up on this idea of being in Omaha and doing life on my own. Why did I even think it was a good idea? You’re in Lincoln. My family’s in Lincoln. I’m comfortable there, and I can do this job there. Maybe this is too hard.”

“The selfish part of me wants to agree and bring you back home, and I understand why, in this moment, you’re second-guessing this decision. But if we remove the situation with Jamie, you’re doing everything you ever wanted. You’re living on your own, working, building your platform. Making connections and teaching others to grow their businesses. You’re pursuing the job you want and having pretty damn good success right off the bat. You’re meeting new people and stepping out of the comfort zone you were sentenced to for so long. I’m so damned proud of you, and I’d hate to see you give up so soon at the first bump in the road.”

“We’re calling this ‘a bump in the road’?”

“A big bump, okay? The kind that spills your coffee and makes you yellshitso loud the person two cars over hears you. But you keep driving to your destination, right?”

“What if it blew a tire? Bent an axle?”

“Do axles bend? Is that a thing?”

“Hell if I know.”

“Well, you call AAA to help you. Or you change the tire yourself because you’re an independent woman.”

“Like I know how to do that! Does my car even have a spare tire?”

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