Page 102 of If Tomorrow Never Comes

She deserved that much.

“I ... wasn’t expecting this. Her.” He ran a hand through his hair, staring aimlessly through his blinds. “Is it okay?” He winced.Don’t ask her permission.“I mean, are you okay? Does it bother you?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think so, but I’m still processing. I mean you’re free to do what you want, obviously. You were never one to move on that quick after a breakup, so I wasn’t expecting it. Especially not with her.”

The words came without thought. “I wasn’t, either, but sometimes love catches you off guard.”

Carly sucked in a sharp breath, and he dropped his head back, mouthing,Fuck.

“Love?” Her voice was quiet but in a way that made the hairs on his neck stand on end. “You just met her. I introduced you two.” She paused. “Right?”

Why, why had he said that?

This was supposed to be a courtesy call to tell her about his current situation, not tell her the truth about when he met Elliott for the first time. Therealfirst time. Yeah, it was more to save them all useless heartache than anything else, because he was certain no matter when he’d met her, they’d have ended up here. Elliott was perfect for him in every way that mattered, and the circumstances of their meeting wouldeventually fade into the background of their lives together. Still, he’d meant to stick only to recent details.

It was the only part of this conversation he’d planned for. But now that she’d asked him point-blank about it, his plan suddenly felt shortsighted. Being selective about what he shared was different from straight-up lying, and he faltered.

“Right?” Carly pushed.

Would this follow him around forever if he kept on this trajectory? Constantly worrying about what he said and if it made sense, along with the timing of supposedly not knowing Elliott beforehand? He didn’t want to hurt Carly, but he didn’t want to hide, either. He wanted to be able to talk about the night he and Elliott met without fear someone might overhear, make the connection, and feed it back to Carly. Enough people had been there the night Tiffany rambled on about the man Elliott was in love with, it would cause a stir within their circle of friends, especially if it came out incidentally.

There was nothing that group loved more than secrets and gossip, and what might be a minor argument now could be a disaster down the road.

With a heaviness in his heart, he sat and rested his head against the wall. He should come clean now. Tell Carly everything, get it out in the open, and let the chips fall where they may.

“Not exactly.”

“What are you talking about?”

Jamie scrubbed a trembling hand down his face. “I’d met Elliott before. Before her transplant.”

Part of him wished he could see her face. Was her silence from anger or confusion? “I don’t understand.”

“It was last year, in May. We weren’t together then, and I was meeting someone from a dating app at Tavern. I got stood up and ended up talking to a woman at the bar. It was Elliott.”

“Okay.” The word was long and drawn out, like,Keep talking.

“She ended up coming along to the baking class I’d reserved for the date I was supposed to have. We walked around downtown and talked, too, and we actually have a lot in common. Back then, I didn’t know the reason, but I never saw her again after that. Now I know it’s because she had the transplant. So a few months ago, when she came to The Patriarch ... I remembered her.”

“Wait.” Confusion marred her tone. “But you acted like complete strangers. Both of you. Why didn’t you say anything?”

This was the part he’d never be able to explain. “I don’t know, I was surprised, and—”

“Wait,” she said again.

He stopped short.

“Holy shit—are you the guy?Theguy? The one Tiffany told us about that kissed Elliott and who she pined over the whole time she was in the hospital?”

A dull ache pounded between his ears. “It was me,” he whispered.

“Are youkiddingme?”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything. That was wrong of me, but you and I weren’t together the night I met her. We had a good time and we kissed, and months later, when I’d heard nothing, I assumed I’d never see her again. I moved on.”

“Yeah, tome.”

“You’re the one who suggested we get back together—”

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