Page 3 of Pucking Secret

“Stace, it’s all going to be okay,” she tells me again. “I’ll stay with you while you take the test. You won’t be alone. You’ll be able to find Owen tomorrow and talk about everything. Just take it one step at a time, all right?”

Though it doesn’t completely wipe away my fears and anxieties, I do feel better having Grace here with me. Braver.

“Okay.” I gulp and give Grace a firm nod. “Okay… okay… I can do this. We can do this.”

“Go take the test. I’ll be right here.”

Giving her one last look, I turn and make my way back into the bathroom. Whatever courage I’d felt at Grace’s encouraging words falters when I’m alone again, peeing on this little stick that could potentially change my life forever.

Once I’m done, I wash my hands and make my way back out to Grace.

“All right. Now… we wait.”

The next two minutes are the longest of my life. Neither Grace nor I say a word as we sit side-by-side on the hallway floor, waiting for the results. Finally, the alarm on my phone goes off, and I hold up the test with trembling hands.

Two pink lines. No… no, no, no, no.

“What’s it say?” Grace asks softly.

“It… it’s positive.”

I’m pregnant.

I’m fuckingpregnant.

The world comes to a grinding halt, and it feels like my life does as well. Nothing will ever be the same. All the dreams and plans I have… those all have to change. It’s like I’m having an out of body experience—that I’m watching this frozen moment from a distance. I can’t feel anything except this gut-twisting panic that swirls inside me and grows bigger and bigger and bigger until it becomes difficult to breathe.

Grace hugs me, squeezing me, but I can’t stop staring at the test.

My life is over, and my mom is going to be so mad. So disappointed.

I’m going down the same path she did. She’s pushed me to be so much more my whole life, and yet, I’m right where she was when her own life fell apart. Repeating the cycle.

“Stace? Stace? Call Owen.” Grace is holding my face in both her hands now. When did she stop hugging me? “I can see you’re freaking out. Call him. He’ll be able to calm you down.”

Nodding, I blindly reach for my phone and dial Owen’s number.

Please… please answer this time! Why isn’t he answering? The phone keeps ringing and ringing.

“This is Owen. Can’t come to the phone right now. Leave a message.”

Beep.

“Owen… Owen, it’s me.” I can hardly speak. I’m crying so hard. “I didn’t want to tell you this way, but I… I took a pregnancy test.” I glance up and meet Grace’s eyes. Her teeth are buried in her bottom lip as she watches me. She gives me a small nod, encouraging me to keep going even as her eyes dance with worry. “It… it turned out positive. I’m pregnant, and I need you to call me back right now. Please, Owen… I need you.”

Sobbing, I hang up and let the phone slip from my hand. Grace folds me into another hug, and I cry uncontrollably into her shoulder. She holds me and comforts me until my tears slow, and I am able to catch my breath.

“Don’t worry,” she tells me, though I don’t know how not to do that right now. “We’ll figure this out, I promise.”

“Why won’t he answer?” I shake my head as my tears pour down my cheeks. “He’s been so weird lately… he won’t talk to me. Something’s been going on with him, but… but I didn’t think he’d just ignore me like this.”

“Hey, hey, hey,” Grace quickly says, squeezing me tighter. “Take a breath. He’ll call you back. This is Owen we’re talking about.”

“You can’t tell anyone.” I look up at her, panic slicing through me. “Please, promise me you won’t tell anyone I’m pregnant.”

“Of course I won’t,” she assures me, her brow furrowed as if my insistence catches her off-guard. “I swear, I won’t say a word, Stace. You can trust me.”

I can. I know that. She might be one of the only people in the whole world I can trust, especially with this. Yet, even with her here, it’s too much to take in. I stare down at the little stick with its two pink lines, wondering what the hell my future holds.

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