Page 97 of Something Like Fate

A crowd of tourists armed with cameras and beach bags whirl up the steps past us, and I cover my eyes to block it all out.

“Are you okay?” Teller asks.

I shake my head. “I just don’t understand. In all these years, you’ve never shown any interest in me.”

“Are you kidding me? I was always interested in you. That whole first summer we worked together, I liked you,” he continues, sensing my skepticism. “I thought it was pretty obvious. I drove you everywhere.”

I can’t help but scoff. “I’m supposed to know you secretly liked me because you drove me places?”

“Well, no. I ... I didn’t know how to tell you, so I just tried to hang out with you as much as I could. And then when you started dating Tim, I assumed you weren’t interested. And by the time you guys broke up ...”

“You’d met Sophie,” I whisper, the realization sinking in. “Did you still have feelings for me when you were with her?” I hold my breath, almost scared to know.

He’s quiet for a few long moments. “I did truly love Sophie. When I met her, I stopped thinking about you like that for a while, pushed the feelings away, I guess. But deep down, I think they’ve always kind of been there. I cared about you more than a friend should, and Sophie knew that. It drove her crazy how much I talked about you. How much I missed you last year.”

“But you didn’t talk to me all year,” I remind him, still unsure this whole conversation isn’t just a fever dream. “I missed you all the damn time. There were so many things that reminded me of you and made me wish you were there. So I’d text you, but you’d barely respond. I have so many unanswered texts from you on my phone.”

“Because I couldn’t do that to Sophie. Every time I talked to you, it was like opening a wound. I’d think about you constantly. I thought not talking to you at all would make things easier—out of sight, out of mind.”

“Is that the real reason you broke up?” The guilt hits me, as though someone’s dropped a sack of bricks on my chest.

He shakes his head. “Yes and no. She was legitimately bored. But I think the bigger issue was that she didn’t have all of me. I guess she never did, which is why I felt so guilty. That’s why I was trying so hard to get her back. I thought I could get over you once and for all and fully invest in her. I wanted to—so badly.”

I hang my head in my hands. “God, Tel. This is ... Why now? Why haven’t you said anything before now? Things could have been so different.”

“Because, Lo!” His expression almost looks pained. “You scare the living shit out of me. You’re loud, spontaneous, and you say the most random things at the most inappropriate times. You’re a living nightmare. And also, a living dream. My whole life I’ve thought with my head, and you ... you make me think with my heart.”

Each word comes at me like puzzle pieces that I haven’t quite figured out how to put together. He continues when I don’t respond.

“And if you want to get technical, I never had time to tell you. I’d just gotten home and out of a relationship and we flew to Italy almost immediately. Andbam, you tell me you have a soulmate. There was never a right time to confess my feelings, certainly not in a way to do them justice. And I knew I could never compete with your damn soulmate.”

“You could,” I choke out. “What if we—”

“Don’t say it.” The words die on my lips, but he knows what I was going to say.What if we try?

“Why not? If you’re so in love with me, why couldn’t you fight for me? You could have told me how you felt, asked me to choose you.”

He scoffs. “Because you never saw me that way.”

“But—” I stop, unable to defend myself.

“You liked guys like Tim Yates, Lo. Why would I ever think I had a chance?”

“But after we hooked up ...” My voice trails.

His gaze narrows. “Would you really choose me over your soulmate?” I think about that. How could I?

“I—”

“If you could say with a hundred percent certainty that you’d choose me, I would be with you in a heartbeat.” He pauses, watching me. “But if I know you, you can’t say that. There would always be part of you that wonders about him. Maybe even regrets not seeing it through. I know how important your family is. How important that vision is to you. I can’t let you walk away from that.”

I suck in a breath. “Why do you have to be so selfless?”

“It’s not totally selfless,” he confesses. “I don’t want to be your second choice. I’ve been invisible my entire life. The backup. The brother only played with when everyone else is busy. Ican’tbe your second choice.”

“So that’s why you messaged Caleb?”

He nods before meeting my gaze again. “I needed you to choose me because you wanted to. Not because he was gone and I was just ... there. I thought I could block my feelings while you figured things out with Caleb, but turns out, I can’t.”

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