Page 40 of Kept By the Loan Shark

“I know,” I interrupted, turning my head to kiss his palm. This close to him, warmed by his body heat and surrounded by his scent, I began to feel the stirrings of desire low in my belly. “You can have expectations tomorrow.”

The corners of his mouth lifted in a grin. “Great expectations?”

I groaned at his horrible pun. “It’s been a while so I’m rusty. Let’s go with lowered expectations.”

He laughed and lowered his mouth to mine. Hand in hand, we moved through the house, turning off lights and checking the doors. He carried my small suitcase upstairs and helped me unpack it before leading me to the upholstered bench at the end of the bed. He sat and beckoned me closer.

As if unwrapping a gift, he took his time peeling away my clothing. When I was naked, he let his hands settle on my waist. Even sitting, he was taller than me, but it was easier to stare into each other’s eyes this way. He leaned forward and began dotting featherlight kisses along my hairline and down each cheek before gently pressing his lips to the tip of my nose and then my mouth. His kisses traveled lower, dusting my jaw and neck and then even lower to the swell of each breast.

With his forehead resting against my chest, he exhaled roughly and confessed, “I was fucking lost without you.”

I slid my arms around his broad shoulders and hugged him close. The hands on my waist moved toward my hips and then to my bottom. Grasping me with both strong hands, he lifted me into his lap and I wrapped my legs around him, savoring the closeness we had been denied for so many weeks.

“I’m here now.” I kissed his temple and combed my fingers through his short hair. “It will take more than Kyle to send me away again.”

His arms tightened around me. “I want to throttle him. I want to make him hurt.” He nuzzled into my neck. “But I won’t. I won’t risk losing you again.”

Knowing how hard it was for him to take a step back and not go after Kyle in the way he wanted, I held his face between my smaller hands and tenderly kissed him. “I love you, John.”

“I don’t deserve it,” he whispered against my lips, “but I’ll do whatever I can to keep it.”

He sealed his vow with a loving kiss before tucking a few stands of loose hair behind my ear. Believing he would, I reached for the top button of his shirt. What should have been an easy task wasn’t so simple anymore, but I took my time and managed all of them. When I glanced at Hagen expecting to see pity, I only saw encouragement.

I pushed the shirt off his shoulders, and he shrugged out of it before standing to rid himself of the rest of his clothing. Once we were both naked, he took my hand, and I followed him into the bathroom. He turned on the shower and kept hold of my hand when I stepped in after him, as if he knew I would be unsteady on my feet.

With movements that were almost reverent, he washed my body and carefully shampooed my hair. He hesitated when his fingers neared my still healing scar. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t.” I glanced back at him over my shoulder. “Just don’t touch the center of it. It’s kind of soft, and it feels weird.”

“Duly noted.” He took his time, cautiously skirting the edges of the wound as he washed and conditioned my hair. When he was done, I thanked him and kissed his chest before leaning back against the tile wall for support. I enjoyed the view, watching the suds rush down his incredible body and swirl around his feet.

After we were both clean, we stepped out onto the bath mats. He wrapped a towel low around his hips before taking a fluffy towel in hand to dry me. I could have done it myself, and it would have been faster, but there was something so incredibly beautiful about the silent apology he was making to me. His actions tonight were his way of showing me that he was serious about doing whatever it took to earn back my trust. He was serious about taking care of me and being there for me. He wanted to atone for his mistakes, and I let him, relishing the feel of his hands gently drying my hair.

As we stood side-by-side at the double vanity brushing our teeth, it was if we had never been apart. Watching him in the mirror, realizing how much we had missed each other and how close we came to never reuniting, I was suddenly gripped with anger at Kyle. If we were right in suspecting he had been the one behind the fatal attack on Travis, he had been the cause of my injury. He had tried to take everything from me—my life, my sight, my education, my future career and my life with Hagen. Somehow, some way, he would pay for what he had done to all of us.

“You look mad as hell,” Hagen remarked as I adjusted the pillows to an angle that would help keep my head lifted and comfortable.

“Not at you,” I assured him as he snuggled in close, wrapping his arms around me and resting his head against my chest. I reveled in the heat of his bare skin on mine, of his lips brushing against my throat and his fingertips trailing down my arm.

“What time do you need to be on campus?”

“I’m not going to campus in the morning. I have a neuro appointment.”

“Can I come with you?”

“Yes.” I ran my fingers through his still damp hair. Feeling sleepy and relaxed, I yawned and let my eyes close. Exhaustion took its toll, but I felt so safe with Hagen that I didn’t mind. I was finally right back where I belonged.

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