Page 97 of It Should Have Been Me

“I won’t leave you again.” She quickly crawls across the bed and straddles my lap. Cupping my face with both hands, she forces me to look up at her. “I promise. I won’t leave you again. I’ll never take you – or what we have – for granted again.”

“You can’t make a promise like that. It’simpossibleto keep a promise like that. You signed a contract. You have to go back at some point and finish it, and when you do?”

I’m silenced when she lifts my hand and places another card on my palm.I pulled out of the contract.

My eyes shoot up to meet hers. “What?” Tears brim in her eyes, and I can tell it’s bad news. “What happened?”

“It...it didn’t go well. I was supposed to fly to Dubai yesterday...and then I got to the airport, and I checked in my luggage...but then I couldn’t get on the plane. I called Gerald and...” She bursts into tears, sobbing so hard her shoulders quake. “He was so mad. I explained the whole situation and I think he understands but...but he says – shit, it’s so bad – he says Golden Sands might sue me for breach of contract, and I’m sure they’re going to blacklist me...so that’s my career pretty much gone.”

My mouth drops open in shock and I’m speechless. She told me this could happen, but now that it has, it seems more severe than I imagined. “Cat, you didn’t have to do that.”

“No, I did...because the heart wants what it wants. The stupid thing doesn’t listen to reason and will destroy any obstacle in its path that tries to stop it from getting what it wants. My career just happened to be another obstacle.”

“You sound like JP,” I say with a small smile.

“He was the one who told me that. He said I should brace myself for the next implosion. I didn’t think it would happen so soon, but...fuck, I just missed you, Scott.” She drops her forehead against mine. “Do you know what it’s like to love someone so much that you’d give up everything for them?”

I chuckle. “I have a vague idea.”

“So that’s what I did. I chose to give it all up, a choice in a series of choices that inevitably led me back to you.” Her arms slide around my neck and she hugs me tight.

I hold on to her for a long time, breathing her in and just absorbing the heaviness of the choice she’s made. She chose me. Inthisversion of our history. Inthisform of our reality. She chose me. “So, what do we do now?”

“Well, first I have to find out how to get my luggage back, and then...considering that I’m poor now, I was wondering if I could move in with you.”

I laugh, but this feels too surreal, and I still have doubts. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

“Yes.” She lifts my hand again and starts placing cards on my palm one by one.

I want to listen to Isa and Tommy’s show every morning.

I want to be there for her if they decide to adopt.

I want to have lunch every week with you and your dad.

I want to help Connor test new games.

I want to get to the point where I can call Keith dad.

I want a lifetime of you holding me in your arms.

I want every one of your kisses.

I want to come home...and home is where you are.

I want to start a family with you.

“But before any of that...”

I want you to marry me.

She waits for me to look up at her. “Will you?”

And then the widest grin takes over my face. “Okay.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah!”

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