Page 90 of It Should Have Been Me

He knocks back his rum in one hard swallow, the smidge of humor fading from his eyes. “Why did you have to sleep with my girlfriend?” He flings his left hand back and slaps my arm, still trying to hurt me. And again, I take it. “Couldn’t you just be happy for her, happy that she moved on and made such a success of her life? Now, you’ve ruined my relationship, and for what? She’s still not staying.” He takes another sip of rum. “I guess you were right. Women are like roses. Beautiful to the trusting eye, but there are sharp thorns beneath the surface that can wound so deeply if you’re not careful.”

“So deep.”

After a long pause, he finally looks at me again. “So, what now? A few weeks ago, Catalina and I were happy, and you were miserable and alone. Now all three of us are miserable and alone? You gave us your disease like it was contagious, so how do you recommend we treat it?”

I sigh heavily, my feeling of disappointment once again renewed. “Unfortunately, I don’t have a long-term cure for that disease, but right now, in the short term...we can drink.”

He nods, raising his glass to click it against mine. “Then let’s drink.”

21. Catalina

Keith releases a deepsigh and scrubs a hand over his jaw. “Well, that wasn’t what I was expecting when I asked where JP was. I thought you were going to say he’s in the gents.”

I shift on the uncomfortable metal chair because it appears that my left ass cheek has gone numb. My flight is only in a few hours, but I had nothing to do and was too depressed to stay at the hotel, so I decided to come to the airport. JP didn’t come back to the hotel room last night. I don’t know where he went. He hasn’t answered any of my calls. I haven’t slept at all, so I blame the exhaustion and my highly charged emotions for me blurting out the whole truth to my parents. They just came to say goodbye and wish me a safe flight. Keith asked where JP was and worry turned me into a blubbering mess. I confessed everything. Not in explicit detail, but they know the gist of it.

“Are you disappointed in me?” I ask with a sniffle.

My mother pulls me into a hug. “No. Everyone makes mistakes, and you made sure none of this impacted your sister when I know it must have taken all your strength to put on a brave face. Oh, my baby girl. I don’t want you flying like this. Can’t you leave tomorrow? Let me see that you’re okay first before you leave here.”

I shake my head. “I’m going to feel the same tomorrow and the next day and the next day. Besides, there’s so much I still need to do when I get back. I need to pack and...figure out what to do with JP’s things.” Tears spill from my eyes again. “I’m going to go to hell for what I did to him.”

“I’m a good lawyer,” Keith says, curling his arm around me. “Maybe I can negotiate a lower sentence for you.”

I nod. “Or parole?”

He grips my head and pulls me closer to kiss my forehead. “You’ll be okay, kiddo. And we may not be there physically, but you can call us whenever you need to talk.”

Keith is such a good dad, and it seems like every time we start to bond, I have to leave again, so our relationship just sort of remains static. We chat for a few more minutes before he eventually looks at his watch.

“We’ve gotta get going,” he says, standing up. “Your aunts are coming over for a post-wedding lunch, which they’re probably going to turn into a mini-party.”

I giggle. “Sounds about right.”

My mother holds me for a little longer, and she’s crying when she pulls away. “With as much time as you’ve been away, you would think that I’d be used to this by now, but it breaks my heart every time you leave. I love you. Please call me as soon as your flight lands.”

“Love you, too, mom.”

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