Page 26 of A Simple Truth

I would either be dead, or I would conquer whatever was holding me back.

But either way, I would no longer be shackled by this power within me.

I’d lost my freedom too many times to let this continue. To let it dictate my consciousness.

I had made it to a spot I found on one of my bird watching walks with Aurelia. It was far away from the camp, far away from anything or anyone, for that matter, I took off my boots, my bare feet turning red at the feel of the snow against the soles. My body already shaking at my insane idea as cold pierced through my body to my bones as I pulled off my cloak before walking into the freezing, rushing river. The slippery rocks below my numb feet felt like they were made of ice, but I pushed further until the cold water was just above my waist.

“This is a terrible idea,” I whispered to myself as my teeth clattered. But these powers would either obey me or die alongside me. But they would not chain me.

Now half-soaked in freezing waters, my mind panicked, but I reeled in the reins tight. The hilt of the Basalt Glass dagger dug into my hand. If things got out of control, I’d stab myself with it and the ice-cold river would keep the fire at bay until then, keeping the camp safe far away.

It was truly a foolproof plan.

I closed my eyes, starting the familiar descent, soon passing the scratched-up walls and echoing chains, to the slowly darkening spiral staircase; one that I had now memorized the steps to.

The thick, mist-like darkness settled within my mind.

Fifty-one, fifty-two...I counted each step, forcing myself to breathe calmly. The previous week, I couldn’t get past seventy before my mind lost itself. But today, I didn’t have that option.Today, I would pull that round handle once again and I would walk through that cursed door.

Today, tomorrow and forever, I would not yield. I would not be enslaved.

But darkness swallowed me whole.

I gasped for air as I panicked, trying to find the ground underneath my feet, water covering my entire body.

“Damn it.” Anger slithered through me as I stood up, the freezing, night air raging through my soaked hair. If I didn’t drown today, I would surely die from the cold. But I held on to the dagger tighter and closed my eyes again.

And again.

And then again.

Step after step, past the halls, past the well-hidden boxes of memories I never wanted to revisit. Past it all, down the hell-cursed staircase.

Seventy-one…I whispered.

My lungs were filled with water, and I coughed franticly, heaving until I felt like I could breathe again. But I closed my eyes again.

Again.

I didn’t hesitate as I now ran towards the darkness.

I will not yield.

I will not be controlled.

Seventy-two.

My eyes opened as I watched the water above pull me further down the river. I pushed the sheer terror away as I jolted upright, shaking the running water off my face, though not trusting my trembling hand as I tied Heart Piercer to my side.

I realized I could no longer feel my legs—they were numb and frozen.

My body screamed at me, my mind begged me, but I closed my eyes once more.

Again.

And then again.

And again.

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