Page 108 of A Simple Truth

Guilt.

Guilt.

Guilt that riddled every cell, every bone in my body, eating me alive like a swarm of bugs on a decaying carcass.

I straightened my legs, gasping for the last bits of air before my body plummeted deep below the surface, the sea swallowing me entirely.

The ice-cold water of the Northern Ocean instantly pierced me down to my marrow, sheer survival taking over my mind as my thoughts quieted, focusing only on propelling my legs and arms through the mass of water to the top.

My lungs burned as the little air that I had expired. I’d never swam in deep waters like this, and I didn’t dare look down to the dark blue void below. The salt water stung my eyes, but I stared up where small, almost nonexistent rays of light danced.

My lungs shrank in agony. Here, I should panic. Here, I should drown and die.

And yet, my mind was tranquil as I pushed my arms up, closing in on the bleak surface above. I fought the urge to gasp for breath, letting water fill my lungs.

I was a warrior.

I was a survivor.

And sometimes that meant surviving my own feelings that were attempting to kill me.

Even then, I’d live.

With one last push, my face broke the surface, frantically gasping for air before another wave covered it. The next time, I managed to stay afloat, filling my lungs with relief as I swam through the rain towards the scattered rocks.

I dared to glance back to the top of the cliff. All of the Ten and all of their opponents, now surrounded by the stunned crowds, stood on the edge, watching me.

There, between them all, stood the General, his ancient eyes as piercing as ever as if he silently asked,

Are you hurt? Are you okay?

Those are two different questions,my eyes replied.But I am not hurt. Remember? I have a tendency to jump off cliffs, General.

He nodded with acceptance, his eyes never leaving my figure as another large wave sent me underwater. I swam as fast as I could, fighting the rain and the waves to stay above the surface.

A stroke. A push. A breath. Again and again, until my hands clasped the nearby rock and my frozen, shaking feet found footing on the small, seaweed-covered trail of rocks hiding underwater, leading to the island. I carefully climbed, slipping just a few times against the slimy stones.

My whole body shook, and my teeth clattered, but I managed to reach the thick, metal pole with the soaking wet flag. A large, red heat wave exploded from the flag the moment I touched it, signaling the end of the Destroyer War Games. Even as the waves crashed into the rocks, covering me in icy drops, I could hear the muffled roaring of the crowds, thrilled by our win.

I hoped they would remember this moment.

I hoped that they would remember this and not what I was about to do.

65

FINNLEAH

The crowds chanted my name as the Ten carried me on their arms towards the large feast that was now spread out for yards in our camp. My eyes scanned the cheerful crowds, looking forhim, disappointment piercing my heart when I didn’t see his dark eyes.

Though I knew it would be worse, I still foolishly craved to see him once more.

The music played as people ate and celebrated. I poked my food, unable to bring myself to take a bite, unable to swallow.

“You okay?” Gia noticed my dull stare at the full plate.

“Yes, but apparently gulping salt ocean water doesn’t sit well with my stomach.” I strenuously laughed it off with her as she smiled wide at me. Broderick came up to her a second later, whispering something into her ear, making her blush.

“Go Gia, go, I’ll be fine.” I nudged her, sending them both a kind smile. “I’m sure the General is going to keep me company,” I replied as Gia let out a small giggle, hesitantly walking away from me, hand in hand with Broderick. I sat at the table starving and yet unable to eat, my muffled thoughts occasionally interrupted by random soldiers congratulating me.

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