Page 65 of Boss with Benefits

What I wanted was for everything to go back to the way it was before my grandfather popped up in my life, complicating everything. What I wanted was for him to stop staring at me like I'd just ripped his heart out.

"Why can't this be enough?" I asked.

"It just can't. Not for me. I'm sorry, Rachel, but this needs to be over."

"What does?"

"Us. Our relationship or whatever you call this toxic thing between us. I can't be casual about this." He met my gaze, his eyes weary. "I think it's best for both of us. We can keep it professional at work, but that's it. Nothing more."

Anger and hurt rushed through me, making my skin hot. "You're the only guy I know who would get mad at having his dick sucked."

"Rach—"

"Forget it." Before he could reply, I stormed out, stumbling down the steps in my skates, gripping the banister.

My emotions were a twisted mess of anger, guilt, and pain. I didn't mean to hurt him. I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I did, but not like this.

* * *

On Monday,I dragged myself into work. I'd spent the rest of the weekend avoiding everyone and everything. I'd shut off my phone and listened to loud music and cleaned my apartment from top to bottom until I was exhausted and fell into bed.

I'd dreaded coming in to work today, and I was right to. Because as soon as I arrived, I saw a message on Slack to meet Derrick in his office ASAP.

I stood in front of his office door, heart pounding like I was about to face a firing squad. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. Derrick's deep voice called me in. He sat behind his desk, looking every bit the competent, composed leader. Next to him was Prathi from HR, her expression neutral but observant.

"Rachel," Derrick said, his voice even, but I could see the tension in his jaw. "Have a seat."

Prathi cleared her throat. "Rachel, Derrick has informed me your relationship has gone beyond a professional capacity. Because of that, HR needs to acknowledge the consensual or nonconsensual nature of your recent interactions. It's important for company records and for both of you that we handle this transparently and professionally. Rachel, you and I are going to speak separately first and then come back here unless other action is needed."

I followed Prathi to an empty conference room. Of course, Derrick had already involved HR. It was so like him.

"I know you're not officially an employee here—you're a consultant—but the sexual harassment policies still apply to you. Let me be clear. You will not get in trouble or lose your contract if you tell me that you felt, in any way, pressured into a sexual relationship with Derrick. Anything you say here is confidential, but if you do make an accusation, we will need to file an official report.

"Rachel." She leaned forward, her voice softening. "We don't tolerate any type of sexual harassment here. Even from the boss. Especially from the boss. If you say there was any sort of foul play, I've got your back. Okay? I don't work for Derrick. I work for all the employees here."

I chewed my lip because if there was any kind of harassment, I was the guilty party. But I got it. It was about power. And he had the power in this dynamic. At work, at least.

"I came on to him," I quickly said. "I wanted it. Derrick made it clear from the start he did not think crossing this line was a good idea."

Prathi exhaled a long breath, then typed into her iPad.

"That's good to hear." She paused and looked at me. "But if you ever need to change what you've said to me today, you can. No consequences, okay?"

I nodded. "Trust me. Derrick did nothing wrong."

Prathi smiled, and we went back to Derrick's office.

"Okay," Prathi said, glancing between us. "I've spoken to Rachel. She confirmed it was consensual."

I nodded. "It was."

Derrick's eyes met mine briefly before looking away. Prathi slid a couple of documents across the desk toward us.

"These forms state that your encounter was consensual and that both parties are aware of the company's policies regarding personal relationships within the workplace."

I signed my name quickly, eager to get this over with. Derrick signed with the same urgency. Prathi collected the papers, giving us both a reassuring smile. "Thank you. That's all I need for now, but I'll continue to monitor the relationship."

I wanted to say there was no relationship. Derrick had made that clear yesterday. Not casual or otherwise.

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