Page 29 of The Sweetest Chirp

Just like I did.

“I do want to make things better between us, but realistically, everything else has changed. We have a daughter, Audrina, and she is my number one concern,” he says, drawing my attention to him. I don’t know what to say, and when he realizes that, he continues. “I made some calls when I was getting her meds. Ingrid’s specialist can see her Thursday, my lawyer will be heretomorrow so we can get things moving on getting her last name change, and then he wants to sit down with you.”

My heart kicks up at the mention of a lawyer. “Why?”

“To talk about options.”

“Options?”

His brown gaze holds mine, and I hate the pain I see in his eyes. I should have known he’d get his lawyers involved. When Thatcher wants something, he doesn’t sit around and wait. He gets it done. “Like I said, I can’t move here. My life is in South Carolina, and either you come willingly or I fight you for custody.”

I blink, my heart lodging itself in my throat as my body goes cold. “Fight me for custody?”

“Yes,” he says softly.

“You want to take my child from me?”

“I want to be in our child’s life,” he clarifies, and my heart is galloping in my chest. “I don’t want to take her from you. I want to be a part of both?—”

“Sounds like you do,” I throw back, my heart trying to come out of my chest. “Sounds like you have already decided to do just that.”

He shakes his head, grabbing the back of his neck. “No, listen. I’ve been such an asshole to you, and I don’t want that anymore. But I can’t allow her to live like this. She needs more, and by coming home, you and I can give her more.” His voice breaks as he looks away, squeezing his neck. A tingle runs through me as I watch him struggle in front of me. “I fucked up, I know I did, but my crime doesn’t deserve this punishment. I want to be her dad, and it’s bad enough I have to travel for hockey. At least, if you’re home, I’ll know you two are safe and she’s getting the best care imaginable, and I can see her when I’m home.” When he looks up, his eyes are flooded with tears. “Please come home.”

A sob bubbles in my throat as I hold his gaze. When I notice movement from beside me, I look over to see Arwen getting up and going around me. She crawls up into Thatcher’s lap, and he wraps his arms around her. His lips dust the top of her head as she leans back against him, cuddling into his chest like she belongs there.

And she does.

She is his mini, and damn it, I know he’s right.

I don’t want him to be, but he is.

I look away, unable to watch them together. I sit up, my back ramrod straight as I put as much steel into my voice as I can muster, “I won’t ever let you take her from me. I know I am wrong for what I’ve done, but?—”

“I would never,” he says softly. “You are an incredible mom, Aud. I wouldn’t do that to her—or you.” My lip wobbles. “Like I said, I don’t want to get our parents involved. I figured a lawyer would strong-arm you into what needs to happen. If that makes me an asshole, get me a shirt made, but Arwen needs more than living in the butthole of Virginia. She should get to meet her grandparents and aunt. I know you can do it on your own. I know you don’t need us, Audrina, but we need you. We need her.”

Tears start to fall because he’s wrong; I do need them. I was just too embarrassed to face them. “Strong-arm me, huh?”

He shrugs, unapologetic. “I don’t think I need him to do anything, but I promised I wouldn’t get our parents involved. So here I am, keeping my promise.”

His promise of never leaving Arwen burns in my brain. Leads my heart to ache. And makes me breathless.

I take a shaky breath before I whisper, “If I do come home, it’s not for you.”

“I understand.”

“There is no us,” I tell him, hoping he believes me.

Because I sure don’t.

“We will be her parents, but you broke me,” I tell him, meeting his watery gaze. “I won’t ever put myself out there for you to break me again.”

Pain moves across his face as he holds my gaze. He inhales a deep breath and then looks down at Arwen, cuddling her closer. “I understand. I just want to be her dad.”

Why do his words hurt?

Why doesn’t he fight for us?

Because you hid his kid, you asshole.

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