Page 39 of The Sweetest Chirp

Idon’t think my heart will beat in its regular cadence once today.

Seeing Ingrid and Audrina embrace, knowing I kept my promise to my baby sister, has my chest burning and aching in a way I wasn’t prepared for. My relationship withIngrid has been so strained since Audrina took off, and all I’ve wanted, other than getting Audrina back, is to restore my relationship with Ingrid. We used to be such a solid family unit, and Audrina’s leaving really messed that up. With that thought, I get why Audrina is scared. For me, I’m excited to have our family back together, to have them meet Arwen. But for Audrina, she has to face the people she left behind.

So much time has passed, I understand that she may feel like things will never be the same. They may not be, but that’s okay. We’ll find our new family unit, and we’ll go back to doing what we do best.

Love each other. Because that will never change.

Man, that four-letter word has me by the balls. Seeing my baby sister touch my daughter with such unconditional love in her eyes leaves me clinging to the nearest steady surface. Ingrid wears her emotions on her face, and I can tell that she is totally in love with her niece. It fills me with such joy, such pride, to know my sister accepts my daughter without question. Not that I thought she wouldn’t. Even if we haven’t been on speaking terms, I know she loves me and supports me. Just as I do the same for her.

Arwen is an extension of me.

Even if Ingrid did ignore me completely when she got in the car. I’m chalking it up to seeing Arwen for the first time. Or, at least, that’s what I’m hoping for.

However, as we enter the house from the garage, it’s clear Audrina must have noticed. “Are you and Ingrid not talking?”

I shrug as I shut the door behind her. “Things have been tense since you left.” Her face scrunches in a grimace before she chews on her lip. “When they saw my letter, they knew I’d caused it and everyone came for me, but I wouldn’t tell them what happened.”

She’s quiet as we make our way through the kitchen, which is top-of-the-line and very modern. My mom doesn’t cook, but her chef loves it in here. Black appliances with gold accents are nuzzled into matte black cabinets with gold handles. The black marble countertop has flower arrangements placed in different spots to brighten the room. A rather large gold chandelier hangs over the breakfast nook, and the floors are a pristine white marble.

My mom likes nice things.

We enter the main foyer where the double stairs split to lead to the second level. The perfect spot for a Christmas tree is between the stairs, where a little platform is raised from the floor and currently holds a table with a family heirloom vase on it below another gold chandelier. Before we make it out of the entry to head to the family room, where I already hear our parents’ voices coming from, Audrina stops me.

I glance over to find her looking up at me with watery eyes. “Why didn’t you tell them?”

I don’t understand the look on her face. It’s as if she can’t hear our parents and all she sees is me. I am probably making that up in my head, but everything falls away as I gaze down at her. “Because I was embarrassed.”

“Embarrassed?” she asks, her brows coming in.

I scoff, tucking my hands into my pockets. “Of course I was. I made a fool of myself. I acted like a jealous jackass when I knew damn well nothing was happening between you and Drouin, yet I made up a whole situation in my head. I let my insecurities and my pain get in my way. Above all, you left me.”

Her brows furrow more, her mouth turning down in a frown. “I bet you were pissed.”

I shake my head sadly. “No, I was devastated.”

Audrina’s breath catches. “What?” she gasps, wrapping her arms around her middle as she gazes up at me.

“If I had known giving you time to cool down really gave you time to leave, I would have chased you down the moment you walked away.”

She blinks, her lips parting. “But you were so mad. Why would you chase me?”

How does she not realize this? “To apologize,” I admit, heat rising up my neck. “I kept telling myself to stop, to step back, but I was fucking fuming and couldn’t get a grasp on my feelings. I kept coming at you, and once you walked away, I was left drowning in my guilt.”

Her eyes are so wide. “Thatcher, that doesn’t make sense to me.”

I swallow thickly, but I don’t look away. My jaw is tight, my heart kicking up to speeds I hadn’t realized it could beat. “What’s not to understand?” I ask, not sure what she is confused about.

“You talked to me like I was the shit on your shoes,” she accuses. “But you felt bad?”

I shake my head, cupping the back of my neck. With my other hand, I pull my hat down low, exhaling. “I didn’t mean to make you feel like that. It just exploded in my face, and all I saw was the girl I wanted, with one of my teammates. I thought I was over what happened with Dart, but I wasn’t. Everything came crashing down on me, and I felt like I wasn’t enough for you. Like you’d always be distracted by my teammates.”

Her eyes darken as she tightens her arms around her waist. “That wasn’t the case at all, Thatcher.” She turns her body toward mine, yet her arms stay wrapped around her middle like a shield. “Why would you feel that way? I never led you to believe I wanted anyone but you.”

“When did you make me feel like you wanted me?” I ask, incredulous. “We danced around each other for years. In a relationship without sex. The only reason I knew you wanted me was when you played that damn song.”

Her eyes widen. “So, you knew.”

“Fuck yeah, I knew, and I jumped at the chance to kiss you.”

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