Page 46 of Sugar Coated

Sylvester shrugged. “She wasn’t feeling too well, so she stayed home with the others. She said, and I quote, she didn’t want to get the little cutie sick.” It was almost funny hearing him say it.

I took a step away from him, muttering, “I hope you’re not sick.”

He chuckled. “Not as far as I know.” Sylvester was a handsome enough man; he cut quite the figure in a suit, it was true, but he didn’t look like your typical mobster. For one, he was blond, with lighter features all around. I knew he was Maddox’s brother, but it made me wonder if they were half-brothers or if Sylvester was adopted into the family.

Fang and Sylvester resumed discussing whatever it was they were talking about before I approached, and I let my eyes roam over the room and all the wealthy, hoity-toity people who came to pretend they’re good people who give a shit about charity.

Tessa was talking to a group of older women, while my dad was talking to a pair of fifty-something-year-old men who looked like they sweat money. For the first time since we got here, Kieran was off to himself in the far corner of the dimly-lit room.

It was like magic; he must’ve sensed I was staring at him, because his dark eyes shifted to me through the crowd, and he beckoned me over by nodding his head once.

I excused myself and made a beeline to Kieran. I’d given him a lot to digest right before we left; he might’ve had questions thatcouldn’t wait. This wasn’t exactly the best place to talk about it, but everyone else was busy having their own conversations, so even though we had eyes on us, it was as good as private.

The moment I reached Kieran, I could see the wheels turning in his head. His eyes were unfocused, and he seemed to be staring off into space. “How are you, uh, holding up?” I asked quietly.

His dark gaze refocused on me, and his lips tugged into a slight frown. “This isn’t…” He shook his head, then reached up and ran a hand through his hair. “This isn’t how I pictured it happening.”

I looked around us, at all of the people who came at my dad’s and Tessa’s call. They were as good as faceless to me. “For some reason, I don’t think you’re talking about this dinner party.” I bit my lower lip. “Don’t worry about it right now. There—”

“I just can’t believe it. Or maybe I don’t want to. Denial is a powerful thing.” He chuckled softly, but it was a bitter sound, devoid of true amusement. His black gaze examined me, and he moved so that the rest of the room had his back as he seemingly gazed deep into my soul. “You know I’ll always protect you, don’t you?”

My mouth opened, a reply ready—because of course I believed he would—but I didn’t get the chance to speak. Something in the back of my throat caught, and no words came out.

Kieran lifted a hand, and he touched my cheek and my jaw in much the same way he had in the house, only something felt different this time. Something nagged at me as he drew his fingertips down the side of my face, softly—so softly, like—

“I always have,” he murmured. “I—” It was clear he was going to say more, but Tessa called for him across the room, and he instantly pulled back from me and dropped his hand, no longer touching my face in a tender way only a lover would.

A lover, or…

My mind spun as I watched Kieran walk away from me. I was rooted in place, unable to move, and my thoughts were a confused conglomeration of memories, all vying for supremacy.

The way he touched me just now, how he’d touched me in the house and right after he’d gotten shot. They were all one and the same: a gentle caress, unspoken promises, quiet yearning for something he so desperately wanted but believed he could never have.

It was the same way someone else used to touch me, and that was why my mind was a mess.

I could not take my eyes off Kieran as he moved through the room, toward Tessa. A nagging, uncertain, confused ball had formed in my gut, growing bigger and bigger as the seconds went by. I could hardly breathe with the ghostly sensation of his touch still lingering on my face.

He made it to Tessa’s side, joining the conversation she was knee-deep in. He said something and made everyone around him laugh, even his sister, and then his head turned and we met eyes across the room. Just like that, the rest of the world ceased to exist; he had me in his web and he knew it.

The look on my face must’ve said it all. Kieran’s lips tugged into a smirk, devious and sly, and he lifted a hand, curling all his fingers into a fist except one—his index finger, and he brought that index finger before his mouth.

The room froze, along with all of the people inside it, or perhaps that’s just how I felt when I watched him mimic that gesture. The air was suddenly filled with a certainty, crisp and clear, bright as the day, and the truth of the matter made my lungs feel so very tight.

Kieran. He wasn’t… he couldn’t.

As soon as he made the gesture, he dropped it and returned his focus to Tessa and the people around them, and the momenthis black eyes left me, it was like I was no longer pinned in place. A hard breath escaped me, and I felt woozy.

I needed to get away from this crowd. I needed… at this point, it was pretty clear I had no idea what I needed.

My feet took me out of the room, into the hall. My chest still felt tight, the dress constricting in a way it wasn’t before. My knees felt weak. I didn’t know how long I stood there, trying to gather myself, but it didn’t seem to help, maybe because I was too close to the room, too close to the dinner party and all of the guests. Maybe I needed to put more distance between me and everyone else so I’d have some peace and quiet, time to think, time to reason, time to come up with another logical explanation.

I took off in a run, not knowing where to go. I ran all the way down the hall, and once it dead-ended, I made a right and spotted a powder room sign. I dashed to the women’s, finding myself in a restroom that had a few small chairs and chaise lounges, along with a whole bunch of mirrors, before the actual restroom part.

Thankfully, I seemed to be alone, so I didn’t attempt to compose myself at all. I went for the closest seat and collapsed onto it, the velvety cushion soft but unwelcome at the same time.

An invisible pressure clawed at my throat, and the strapless bra I had on beneath this dress felt like it had grown two sizes too tight within the last few minutes. My thoughts still swirled around, the unease and anxiety inside me both unable and unwilling to calm as I replayed what Kieran said and what he did.

Just like that, all of the pieces began to come together.

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