Page 34 of Wandering Closer

You still being a slug?

He texted me this morning asking if I was enjoying a porch coffee. It was the first morning in a while I hadn’t, but my bed was just too comfortable to leave, so I told him I was hibernating for the day.

Lily:

Haven’t moved in 4 hours.

Thoren:

How did I know? When you do finally move, check your front porch.

That got me to leave my post. Did he come to my house and I didn’t even notice? I fling open the balcony door and skip down the steps to my front door, where a plastic bag awaits me. I glance around as I grab it. Thoren is nowhere to be found, but I’m starting to like that he leaves gifts on my porch. Inside, I put the bag on my counter, pulling out warm containers. There’s a water bottle filled with pale pink liquid, a container with a roasted sweet potato, and one that holds grilled chicken stripswith what looks like a mango salsa topping. My phone pings again beside me.

Thoren:

I discovered I don’t own to-go cups that won’t spill. The water bottle has a rose and chamomile tea in it. My mom’s favorite.

I don’t even know what to say. He knew I was having a reset day, so he made me dinner. I have never felt so seen or cared for in my life. My parents never took rest days. They said it was lazy and set a bad precedent. When I allowed myself one, I was met with disappointment. Yet here Thoren was, bringing me food with zero judgement.

Lily:

Thank you, it all looks and smells amazing. How’d you sneak it over?

Thoren:

There was no sneaking, Shadow and I just dropped it off on our way out for a run. Enjoy your night, Lily.

Crap.I really didn’t think I was ready for another relationship, but Thoren is no ordinary man. He came out of nowhere, throwing around green flags like they were beads at Mardi Gras. I didn’t listen to the red flags from Tyler, and I learned the hard way from that mistake. Tyler taught me not to take a man’s words at face value, yet here I am, trusting Thoren. He also spoke with words and actions, which is something my dad always talked highly about when I was a kid, telling meThe words of another means nothing without the actions to prove it. Watch the way a man treats you and those who can do nothing for him, meisje, and you will know if his words hold weight.Thoren’s words held their weight. Hell, half the time he didn’t even use words, just actions. His actions tell me he’s a good man, who in just a month’s time cares deeply for me already.

Those feelings were mutual. I want to have a closed off heart, one that is surrounded by impenetrable walls to keep me safe. The tattered organ in my chest seems to beat easily around him though. His soft smiles, the way he always finds a way to touch me in the most reassuring of ways, his subtle dominance in keeping me protected. He stokes a fire inside of me just by being himself. Maybe I need to let myself feel what my body and heart are clearly craving from him.

I carry the food and tea to my small table and dig in. The man can cook, and I’m starting to think there’s not much he can’t do. He has the body of a Greek god, he can renovate a house, fix my deck, cook amazing meals, and he’s selfless and loves his family. I never stood a chance against him.

I send off a thank you for the incredible dinner and retreat upstairs. I may have done nothing today, but I’m mentally exhausted at just the thought of the phone call with the lawyer tomorrow. My hope is she will be okay with a brief explanation so I can tell the full story to her in person when we meet. I don’t want to recount it all on the phone and again when we are together.

Since moving here, I have allowed myself time to reflect and rest when my body and mind call for it. I never realized how much one day of reprieve could have such a major impact on my stress level and outlook. I don’t think I can ever go back to a rigid corporate schedule with no ‘me time’ after this.

After an early bedtime, I rose with the sun this morning. With coffee and notepad in hand, I reclaim my usual morning routine on the back porch to start on my grocery list. I only have milk written when a rustling in the woods and Shadow’s telltale woof interrupt me. She comes barreling onto the deck and straight to my feet, waiting for pets.

Her furry face, floppy ears, and tongue hanging out make my entire morning, but it gets even better when Thoren steps up onto the deck with his morning mug of coffee. Much to my disappointment, he has a shirt on this time, but his work uniform of dark green utility pants and a green shirt sitting tight over his broad chest is just as drool worthy.

“Morning,” he says nonchalantly as he takes a seat next to me. “Did you sleep well?”

I grin into my coffee as I bring it to my lips. “Good morning, neighbor. I did, did you?”

“I slept wonderfully.” He leans back on the outdoor sofa, stretching his free arm out behind me. He smells good, his crisp woodsy scent blending with the morning dew around us.

“So is this our thing now? You two hooligans showing up to drink our coffee together?”

He takes a long sip, not dropping eye contact. “Do you want it to be?”

I think for a moment, tapping my finger on my chin. It certainly starts my day off right, seeing both of their smiling faces. Plus if he’s going to be in this uniform for me to drool over… yeah, I could get used to mornings like this.

“I wouldn’t mind it. What happens if I’m not up?” It’s not even seven, and there are days I may not drag my butt out of bed on time to do this with him before he leaves for work.

“Shadow seems to know. She didn’t run to you yesterday and you said you weren’t out here. Today, however, she raced over here the moment I opened my back door.”

I peek down at my favorite girl, rolling around on the deck and chewing on a leaf she found. My chest squeezes at the sight. She seems to be as in tune with me as Thoren is. Having her here today would make things easier knowing she’s by my side.

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