Page 50 of Zane

All of that combined to make her feel incredibly sad and like she’d never have love and joy in her life again.

Alice Kennedy’s words came to mind.We’ve been praying so much for the both of you.Would those prayers make any difference?

Kelsey went to put her newly purchased shampoo and conditioner bottles in the shower in her attached bathroom, then took her chocolate bar to the chair near the bay window. With a sigh, she sank into it and stared out the window.

Serenity was actually a nice little town, and in different circumstances, she might have loved to live there. She hadn’t really considered it because in all the time she’d known Zane, he’d always made it very clear he’d never live in his hometown.

Even now, she knew it was only a temporary home.

If Zane didn’t remember her and things didn’t work out between them, she’d be leaving on her own.

And if he did get his memory back, he wouldn’t want to stay there, so they’d both be leaving.

The second option was preferable, but she had a feeling that wasn’t going to be the one she got.

Unwrapping her candy bar, she broke off a piece and popped it into her mouth. The delicious melt of the chocolate gave her a momentary burst of pleasure. Her appetite still wasn’t what it had once been, but she always had room for chocolate.

There had been talk the evening before about some of the Halverson siblings coming over for a Friday night dinner. Kelsey wasn’t all that keen on hanging out with them. She felt very much like she was being tolerated, and she’d already had enough of that in her lifetime.

When she’d visited at Christmas time with Zane, she hadn’t really given much thought to whether they wanted her there or not. They’d been polite toward her, which seemed appropriate considering they were meeting her for the first time. It wasn’t until they’d gotten married that the family’s feelings about her had become more apparent.

Being in Serenity now, whenherZane wasn’t there to stand at her side and be a buffer, made being with the Halversons difficult. Rori was about the only person—well, and Lee—who made Kelsey feel welcome and like she belonged there.

No one went out of their way to snub her, but none of them really sought her out for conversation. It made her feel like they blamed her in some way for what had happened to Zane. Or worse, that they didn’t think he was going to remember her, so it wasn’t worth their time to get to know her since she’d be leaving, eventually.

Granted, she knew that his siblings were all busy with their careers and their families, so she didn’t expect them to take thetime out of their schedule to spend with her. But it still hurt, especially since she was aware they’d known, and apparently liked, Zane’s Sarah.

When her chocolate bar was gone, Kelsey frowned down at the empty wrapper. She crumpled it in her hand, then got up and went to drop it into the garbage can. While she was up, she went to the small desk in the room and picked up her tablet.

She was still planning to take the nursing exam, so she’d looked up the nearest place offering it. Turned out, she’d likely have to go to Spokane, which was over an hour away.

Knowing that, she still tried to spend time each day studying. Thankfully, it was a good way to pass the time once she’d done her daily check for jobs in the area.

She had to keep some purpose in her life, or she was going to lose her mind. If she couldn’t have a relationship or a job, she’d at least continue on her path to becoming a nurse.

It might take a little longer, but if she ended up leaving Serenity, at least she’d be in a position of having what she needed to apply for nursing jobs. Hopefully.

From the moment she’d decided to pursue nursing, she’d kept her plans to herself, doing her best to juggle her classes and practicum with her shifts at the restaurant. She had only let Zane in on her plans after they’d been dating for around three months. When she’d asked him not to tell anyone about it until she’d passed the NCLEX, he’d agreed, though he’d thought his family would be supportive of her efforts.

Unfortunately, so often in her life, her attempts to strive for more than just the bare minimum had been dismissed and even discouraged. She’d learned to present things as a done deal, knowing that she’d have no support for the journey to her goals.

Zane had been supportive of her efforts, and he’d respected his promise not to share her news. But now he didn’t remember what she’d told him, so no one knew.

After a couple of hours of distracted studying, there was a knock on Kelsey’s door. Setting her tablet aside, she got to her feet and went to answer it.

“Hey, Kelsey,” Rori said with a big smile. “How was your day?”

Kelsey stepped back so Rori could come in. “It was fine. How was yours?”

“Someone dropped off another litter of cats today, so we had to deal with them. They are so cute.”

“Did you bring one home?” Kelsey asked.

“Nope. Lee still says absolutely not.” Rori glanced around. “You could have a cat here if you wanted.”

“Really?” Kelsey was surprised at that.

“As long as the cat stayed in your room, it would probably be okay.”

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