Page 97 of Zane

“I’ll pray that it’s nothing like that.”

Kelsey hesitated a moment before she said, “Thank you.”

Left alone once Kelsey had left for work, Zane’s thoughts went to the totes up in his room. He’d gone through them the night before, discovering his old set of knives, among other things. At the bottom of one of them, he’d also discovered a box that contained the remnants of his relationship with Sarah.

He’d found a journal, which had surprised him, since he wasn’t given to journaling. Reading the first page had revealed that he’d started writing his thoughts and emotions down because he felt there was no other outlet for them. Everyone—including his family—had urged him to move forward and just let Sarah get on with her life.

His pain over the end of their relationship had been splashed all over the pages, though he’d stopped reading after five or six entries. It was clear that he had struggled greatly with the breakup. But that wasn’t too surprising, considering he was still struggling with the knowledge that he’d not only lost Sarah, but she’d gone on to marry someone else.

The anguish in his words had been too much for Zane the previous night. It wouldn’t help him move forward if he allowed himself to wallow in the pain he’d experienced already several years in the past.

Maybe he needed to read the last entries he’d written to see the state of his mind when he’d finally stopped writing them. Maybe he’d even mentioned Kelsey.

A thought had been lingering in his mind since they’d decided to try to make their marriage work that he needed to talk to someone. To get some advice from someone outside the situation. The person who came to mind was Pastor Kennedy.

He pulled out his phone and sent a text off to Will, asking for his dad’s phone number.

Will:He’s probably in bed, if you’re planning to call him, but you could probably send a text, and he’ll get back to you in the morning.

Zane thanked him for the number, appreciative of the fact that Will didn’t ask why he wanted it.

After a brief hesitation, he typed out a message to the pastor.

Hi, Pastor Kennedy. This is Zane. I was wondering if I’d be able to stop by for a chat tomorrow. I find myself in need of some counsel.

Zane couldn’t remember a time in his life when Pastor Kennedy hadn’t been part of it, so he knew that he could trust the man to give him thoughtful yet straightforward advice. He wasn’t sure that he would get that from his parents. Their love for him would probably overshadow their ability to give him good guidance that didn’t favor him over Kelsey.

He needed someone who would look out for Kelsey’s interests as well as his own, and he thought Will’s dad could be that person.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

“You’re up early,” Lee said when Zane crutched his way into the kitchen the next morning. It was just after seven o’clock, which was a time he rarely saw if he could help it.

“Couldn’t sleep.” Zane made it to the coffeemaker, got himself a mug from the mug tree, and filled it with coffee.

“Everything okay?” Lee asked as he leaned a hip against the counter. He lifted the mug he held to take a sip.

“Nope.” If there was one person Zane felt he could be mostly honest with, it was Lee. “Been awhile since I felt like anything was even remotely okay.”

Zane slid his mug along the counter, while using his crutches to get to a barstool. Lee reached out and picked the mug up, then set it in front of the seat Zane usually chose.

Sinking down onto the barstool, Zane said, “Thank you.”

“Want something to eat?”

“Not at the moment.”

“Anything in particular that’s bothering you?”

“Stuff with Kelsey,” he said. “I just don’t know how to navigate it.”

Lee nodded, but he didn’t say anything.

“I’m going to talk to Pastor Kennedy today, hopefully. I messaged him to ask if he’d have time for me.”

“That’s a good idea,” Lee said. “He’s a good one to talk to.”

“I just need some guidance and maybe some insight into how to handle everything.”

---