Page 33 of Caged Bird

“I know. But seriously, I will tell her if you even so much as look like you’re going to show her the door. Check out the crowd, Eve. They’re eating her up.”

The club had been busier than ever the last year or two, but when Laura’s sexy librarian act had hit the stage, we’d seen an even higher rate of return customers.

There was no doubt she was good for business.

Just like Fawn had been.

At least this one didn’t dye her hair blond like Fawn had.

Maybe I’d let her stay.

In my office, I closed the door.

“Hey, Evil.”

I jumped about a mile, spinning around, hand to my heart, only to see my stupidly attractive husband sprawled out on the couch.

“Jesus, you scared me! What are you doing here?”

A sheepish expression settled on his sweet face, and he pointed at the brown paper bag sitting on the couch with him. “Brought you a little something.”

I eyed the bag suspiciously. “Did Tiffany’s change their branding?”

He grabbed my wrist and pulled me onto his lap, not bothered that I was sweaty and only wearing the lingerie I’d danced in. He ran his nose up the side of my neck and placed sweet kisses along my jawline until he got to my lips.

I knew I was being buttered up for something, but I never could resist the man, and when his lips pressed against mine, I responded enthusiastically, kissing him back.

His fingers fisted in the back of my hair, tugging my head to expose my neck, and he trailed kisses along it, licking and sucking with quick flicks of his tongue. His dick got hard beneath me, and I ground over him, feeling my body respond to his, just like it always did.

“No jewelry inside this time. Just a pregnancy test.”

I stiffened. “It’s going to be negative.”

He drew back, brushing his lips over mine gently. “You’re two days late, and you won’t know if you don’t test.”

I sighed. “What’s the point? If the last two rounds of IVF didn’t work, the odds of us suddenly getting pregnant by ourselves in between cycles is pretty much impossible.”

“Pretty much, but not totally.” He put the brown paper bag into my hand. “Please, babe. I can’t stand the not knowing. It’s all I thought about today.”

He wasn’t the only one. But it was just so hard to keep doing this to myself. We’d spent years trying, and then more going through all sorts of treatments that hadn’t worked either. We’d gone through periods where our entire lives had revolved around trying to get pregnant, each one ending with me sitting on the bathroom floor in tears, Boston wrapped around me, holding me together.

He and the club were the things that kept me going. But I wanted to be a mom more than anything, and yet it seemed the one thing we just couldn’t work out how to do.

But I knew I was going to have to take that test at some point. So it might as well be now.

I kissed my man, my heart full of love for him and the way he somehow managed to keep being optimistic, month after month,year after year. He wanted this just as much as I did. Had cried just as many tears.

All I wanted was to make him a daddy.

I left him on the couch and took the test into the bathroom to pee on the stick. When I’d finished, placed the test face down on the sink, and washed my hands, I opened the door, calling him in.

He glanced at his watch, and then at me, his fingers finding mine and threading in between. He squeezed them softly. “It’s going to be positive.”

I so wanted to believe it.

But I just didn’t.

I smiled for him anyway, because I loved him and I would have given anything for him to be right.

---