Page 102 of Caged Bird

It was stupid to still hope he was here, after all this time. I’d told him I needed to be on my own, and he’d granted me the space I’d asked for.

I’d been grateful he hadn’t left a contact number. Grateful I’d had no way of finding out where he lived or what he was doing with his time. Vincent or Ophelia would have found him for me if I’d asked, I guessed, but I hadn’t.

If I knew where he was, it would have been all too easy to run back into his arms and let him stitch me back together.

When my heart knew I needed to do that for myself. I needed to build that confidence back up alone, so there was no doubt in my mind that I would ever be reliant on a man again.

Ever.

I’d thought the ache in my heart would go away. I thought it would forget the way he held me. The way his touch made my body come alive. I thought I could lock the memories of him up in the same box I’d put Eddie into, still there in my head, but not at the front of my mind anymore.

But while I was slowly moving on, the nightmares about Eddie lessening with every therapy session, my feelings for Zane hadn’t budged.

I still loved him. And I missed him every day.

Seeing his truck all over town, but it never actually being him, was one of the hardest reminders that I’d had something with Zane. Something important I’d let go and now bitterly missed.

I shook off the tremble in my body that started every time I thought about him and pulled my shoulders back, striding to the hospital reception desk. Today wasn’t the time to mourn what I’d lost.

Today was all about celebrating the new life my best friends were bringing into the world. There was no room for sadness. Only joy.

With the receptionist’s directions in my head, I followed the corridors, twisting and turning through the complex maze of the hospital until I found the delivery suites.

I had to be buzzed in, and then identified at another nurses’ station before I was allowed down to the room Eve was in.

The door opened just as I got there, Boston walking out, tears in his eyes.

I grabbed him, fear punching through me like lightning. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

He shook his head and swallowed hard; clearly overcome with emotion he couldn’t shake. He opened the door behind him. “Just look.”

In a white hospital room, Eve sat with a tiny bundled-up baby in her arms. I gasped and swiveled between her and Boston. “You didn’t wait for me?”

Eve raised her head, laughter on her lips as she held an arm out. “We tried, I swear. But you took too long!” She smiled down softly at the baby. “Come meet your new nephew.”

I tiptoed into the room and perched on the bed beside her, sucking in a breath at my first glimpse of the sweet little face and all his dark hair. Tears filled my eyes, and I wiped them away with the back of my hand. Boston sat on a chair across the room, grinning at all of us like he’d just won the lottery.

“He looks like his dad,” Eve whispered.

Boston shook his head. “He’s all you, Evil.”

I smiled at the nickname, and at the pure, sweet, honest love between the two of them.

But it made my heart hurt a bit too. Because this hadn’t been my experience. I’d once had a perfect tiny baby like this, too, but he’d been born at home alone, with nobody but me to catch him, and hold him and love him.

This baby boy would know none of that, and I was grateful for it. All he would know was love. He’d have a mom and dad who adored him, and a whole host of extended family who would dote on him.

“Do you want to hold him?” Eve asked.

I nodded, reaching for the little bundle. “You haven’t even told me his name yet.”

“It’s Oliver.” Boston grinned. “Figured Otis might like having a cousin who also has an O name.”

I laughed and took the baby from Eve’s outstretched arms. “It’s perfect.” I cradled the baby in my arms and imagined all the trouble he and Otis would get into one day. This baby was part of my family. I knew in my heart I was never going to have another, but I loved that Otis would have cousins in Eve’s and Lyric’s and Vincent’s kids. That he would grow up with the closest thing he could get to siblings. The last few months had shown me we had a family here, one who’d never forgotten us, and were willing to welcome us back into their lives with open arms.

I brushed a lock of the baby’s hair off his sweet forehead. “You know, Oliver, you could have just waited a few more hours. Then we could have shared a birthday.”

Eve clapped a hand over her mouth. “I didn’t even realize what the date was. Once the contractions started, they were all I could focus on.” She pouted. “Would have been so lovely for the two of you to share your day!”