Page 62 of Exile

***

It was a twelve-hour drive to Burlington, and Caspian decided to get on the road on Friday night. We drove halfway and slept in a small town motel, then continued our drive to Burlington this morning.

Caspian had been quiet throughout most of the drive. It wasn’t unlike him to keep to himself, but most times, he didn’t have a reason to. This trip made him nervous, though. Hell, I was nervous too. This wasn’t just a visit. It was a reckoning.

My mind raced with possibilities. Would Mom admit what she had done or keep pretending? Would she even give Caspian a chance to speak? Anything could happen, but Caspian wasn’t alone. He had me right by his side, and I had already made up my mind about where and with whom I wanted to spend the next years of my life.

By the time we pulled into the driveway, my hands felt clammy. But in a way, it felt good to be back home. Even if it was only temporary. I looked over at him and smiled tightly, reaching for his hand to squeeze it. “I’m right here. If she’s not able to have a mature conversation, we’ll just leave.”

He studied our hands, turning his around so his palm was facing mine. I slight my fingers through his, interlocking them. He gave a quick nod before meeting my gaze. “Okay. Sounds like a plan.”

I squeezed his hand once more before we both stepped out of the car. With one more glance at Caspian, we stepped forward to reach the front door.

I rang the doorbell—not wanting to intrude by just unlocking the door to my childhood home myself—and the door swung open shortly after. Mom stood in the entryway, her eyes never meeting Caspian’s as she took me in. There was a hint of relief on her face, but uncertainty was the emotion that took over most of her expression.

“Hi, Mom,” I said with a small smile. I wasn’t sure if she wanted to hug me, but I stepped forward and did it anyway. She didn’t hesitate to put her arms around me, and I felt her body ease as we stood there hugging for a while.

“Hey, sweetie. It’s good to have you back.” She caressed my hair, and it broke my heart to hear how much hope she had said it with. She was convinced that I’d stay, even after I told her that I would move out.

I let go of her and took a step back, wanting her to say hello to Caspian. I looked at her with an expectant glance, but it was Caspian who took the first step.

“Hello, Julie. You look beautiful.” His words were filled with so much love and pain. I couldn’t imagine how he was feeling. He hadn’t seen Mom in years.

Mom looked up at him, swallowing hard with a tight jaw. “Hello, Dad.”

Well, at least she didn’t fully disown him.

Mom stepped aside then, gesturing for us to go inside. “Come in.”

I went ahead, walking straight toward the living room. Mom motioned toward the couches, and we sat down after taking off our jackets while she went to grab us something to drink.

I glanced at Caspian, smiling gently to reassure him that everything will be okay. He gave a nod, then moved his eyes to Mom when she reappeared and sat down on the other couch opposite of us.

“How have you been, Mom?” I asked, trying to ease the tension.

“Good. Work has been stressful, but I’m managing. Dale is on a work trip, so I have time to myself again. I finally had the chance to start a book.”

I smiled at her. “That’s nice. What kind of book?”

She hesitated, then glanced at Caspian briefly before answering. “Something light. A romance novel.”

Caspian gave a small, polite nod but said nothing. He was letting her set the tone, letting her ease into the conversation. I appreciated that, but I also knew we couldn’t dance around the real reason we were here forever.

Silence stretched between us, thick with unspoken words. I didn’t want to push her or urge her to come clean, but I couldn’t wait any longer. I wanted them to clear the things that kept them apart for years. The reason for me never meeting Caspian before.

I cleared my throat as the silence became unbearable. “Mom, you know why we came.”

Her face tensed, her fingers tightening around the glass in her hands. “I know.”

“Can we talk about it?”

She inhaled sharply but didn’t respond immediately. Instead, she placed her glass down on the coffee table and folded her hands in her lap. “Wynnie, I don’t know what Caspian has told you, but—”

“He told me the truth, Mom,” I interrupted softly. “That he tried. That he wanted to be in my life and yours, but you wouldn’t let him.”

Her lips parted, but no words came out. Caspian, still quiet, sat with his hands clasped between his knees, his gaze never leaving her. He wasn’t here to fight or argue. He was here for closure.

Finally, Mom exhaled and looked down. “I was scared,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “He…” She stopped and looked at Caspian, wanting to address him directly. “You weren’t around much. You were busy with your acting, and I thought that…if I cut you off immediately, you wouldn’t get the chance to leave me, and it wouldn’t have hurt as much.”