Page 85 of Blinding Light

Last night he had spoken to Moargan about closure. It had felt important at the time, though honestly, he hadn’t been sure what he meant with it. Everything still felt so raw. His disappointment. The pain of having been thrown away.

But he was going to face it. He hadn’t spent years of his life searching for the truth, only to back out like a coward once the first horrific facts were unveiled. No, he was ready to reveal every single disgusting detail. And perhaps he’d even find his mother in that run-down apartment. He just hoped it wasn’t imprisoned in that tiny, dark room.

As soon as their improvisation class marked the end of the day, Cyprian headed for the bus. He could have taken the easy way and accept the ride his guards offered, but habits seemed to kick in at the most inconvenient times. The ride was long and a much needed one, clearing Cyprian’s troubled thoughts.

When he finally reached the same dodgy neighborhood as the one that had filled his heart with disillusions before, hewalked toward the apartment. Everything looked even gloomier than it had that first time, making his earlier bravado falter. Whatever it was that he’d felt inside of him—strength and determination and maybe even some Dariux?---had entirely disappeared by the time he made it inside the apartment block.

The walls were still smudged with stains. The stairs still creaked. The first floor was still noisy with cries and fights and the sounds of tv. And when he finally had the courage to knock on the door of apartment 12C, he wasn’t surprised that nobody answered.

There was the sound of a key being turned, then another door opened, followed by the wrinkled face of an old woman. She peered at him. “Yes?”

Cyprian cleared his throat, pointing at the door behind him. “I’m looking for Celia Fandi.”

Astonishment flared through her eyes. “Celia? Oh dear, she hasn’t been here for many, many years.”

Are you sure?Cyprian wanted to ask.

The woman waved with her hand. “The apartment is for rent. The Luminary came and emptied it yesterday.”

“Where did Ludo go?”

The woman scoffed. “That disgrace of mankind you mean? He’s gone. Finally.”

Cyprian blinked rapidly. His mind was spinning, only to settle on a disappointing truth—there was nothing here. “Thank you,” he managed and turned back to the door of apartment 12C. This was it. There was no dark room, no prisoner. No mother waiting for him. Not even his broken dreams were scattered around here on the dirty street of this shabby neighborhood.

There was…nothing.

It was almost as if there never had been anything to begin with. That feeling drained all the energy out of him. And there he stood, still facing apartment 12C, when the tears finallycame. Once they did, he couldn’t stop. His heart broke, the crack sending shudders through his entire body, making him stumble and grab the wall as he held on.

Celia Fandi.Wherever she was, wasn’t here.

Siblings?Not here.

Teardrops blurred his vision. Through his ringing ears, he heard his own desperate sobs. Cyprian wept. He couldn’t move, couldn’t think. His mind for once a peaceful nothing, while his knees trembled.

Strong arms encased him in a tight grip and then he cried inside the crook of Moargan’s throat. Cyprian inhaled desperately, needing his scent of pine tar and opium, needed his warmth to unfreeze his cold limbs.

“Let’s get you out of here.”

Moargan lifted him up bridal style and Cyprian didn’t have the energy to complain. He could only close his eyes and press his nose closer to Moargan’s skin as they descended the stairs. At some point he must have fallen asleep, because when he came to, he sat leaned back in the hover car, his head still pressed against Moargan who was scrolling through the news on his multi-slate.

“How are you feeling?”

“Tired.” Cyprian stretched, taking his time to get the cramp out of his limbs. “Better. Good.” He turned to face the Imperial Prince. “Are you mad at me?”

“Which part are you referring to? For ignoring your guards, or for not including me in your wild plans?”

Cyprian groaned. Suddenly this whole trip sounded like madness.

Moargan’s gaze softened as he cupped his chin, forcing him to meet his eyes. “I can’t say I understand why you’d go back to that shithole after what happened yesterday. But then, I can’t understand what it’s like to live without knowing my family. You spoke of closure. I take it this is it?”

Cyprian nodded. “I think it is. At least when it comes to Ludo. Things will take time, I suppose, but yeah…”

“Good.” Moargan’s gaze narrowed and his amethyst irises flared. “There’s something else. What is it?”

“I think, perhaps, I’m feeling something.”

“Something?”

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