Page 18 of Vicious Addictions

“Love you too.” I chuckle, but as soon as her face disappears from the phone screen, a crushing loneliness settles over me.

It feels like I’m in purgatory, being this far away from them.

And that reminds me—Father McDonagh.

I quickly call my father, hoping I can still catch him.

“Jude,” he answers, sounding a bit wary.

“Hi, Papa.”

“Is everything alright?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Because you usually call later in the day and…” he hesitates.

“And what, Papa?”

“Give me a second,” he says before I see him walk into his office and close the door behind him. “And because I know about your recent clandestine activities,” he ends.

Shit.

“Crane told you,” I mutter, pressing my fist against my forehead.

“Of course he did. Did you really think he wouldn’t?”

Hoped…

I hoped he wouldn’t.

“Don’t act surprised. He’s a Boss training another Boss’s son. Things like that get found out quick. Or did you honestly believe that decades’ worth of an alliance would just dissolve because my son decided to go behind my back and defy me?”

“That’s not what I did,” I defend. “If you let me explain—”

“Spare me, Jude. It’s exactly what you did. Don’t try to even deny it. I raised you better than that,” he says, his voice edged with steel.

And then it hits me—I’ve been working for Crane for over a month, and my father is only bringing this up now.

Which means he could have told Crane to send me packing at any time he wanted to.

But he didn’t.

“Did you tell Mom?”

“There are easier ways to get killed, son. Less terrifying, too.” He chuckles.

“So you didn’t tell her?”

“Of course not. She only agreed to let you attend college in England because she wanted you as far away from my world as possible. If she knew you were working for The Firm, she’d be knocking on your door to bring you home before day’s end.”

“I thought that’s what you wanted too.”

“It is.” He exhales, his voice quieter now. “But I’d rather you get this out of your system where she can’t see it.”

“You still think me wanting to be inducted is a phase?”

“I think you’re stubborn, just like your mother. Once you get an idea in your head, not even God himself can stop you. So I’d rather step aside and let you figure it out for yourself.”

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