Page 52 of Deviant

“Whatever you say, big brother. Just know that if you can’t step up and do what needs to be done, I will.”

With that ominous remark still hanging between them, I run back to Nora’s room, able to leave without being caught eavesdropping on such an intimate conversation. I jump into bed, my heart still racing from what I overheard, trying to make sense of all of it. A few seconds later, Nora enters the room and closes the door behind her.

“I know you’re awake, Roe,” she says, unimpressed with me trying to pull a fast one on her.

“Sorry,” I mumble and push the comforter away, lifting my knees to my chin and hugging them to my chest.

“I’m sick and tired of that word,” she spits out, sitting next to me. “That’s all I ever hear lately. Sorry that we can’t do more for your mother. Sorry that she’s dying before your very eyes. Sorry that we have few resources to help her relieve her pain. Sorry…sorry…sorry….I’m so fucking over that word,” she all but shouts, her whole body trembling in anger.

“Hey,” I comfort her, quickly wrapping my arm around her trembling shoulders, “It’s going to be okay.”

“It’s’ not, Roe. Nothing will ever be okay if my mom dies. She’s the glue that holds this family together. Without her…I have no idea what will become of us.”

I want to remind her that she still has her dad, but we both know that having Nora’s dad or none at all is the same thing.

“Elias will never leave you,” I say assuredly because it’s true.

Elias may hate Aidan for some reason, but Nora is his whole world. Much like she is mine.

Aidan might be my boyfriend, but he doesn’t hold a candle to Nora.

I love her with all my heart. She’s the better part of me. The one that is daring and brave.

I’m a mouse. A scared little mouse. Never wanting to rock the boat for fear that it may tip over and drown me completely.

Nora…is fearless. She’s a force of nature, just like Elias. It’s awe-inspiring. And terrifying.

“I know that,” Nora says, pulling me out of my thoughts. “But I need more from him, and right now, I can’t count on E to do what needs to be done. He’s just too…“ Psychotic? Unhinged? Hot? “Set in his ways,” she finishes. “It’s not his fault. With him trying to keep a roof over our heads all year round, he’s got too much on his plate as it is. I know he’s had to grow up fast and become the responsible adult around here, but that also means he’s seeing things way too pragmaticallyfor my liking. We should be thinking outside of the box, but I fear my big brother has become way too sensible in his old age.”

If the air in the room wasn’t so tense, I would have laughed at Nora’s suggestion of Elias being old and sensible.

Elias is only twenty-three, so hardly old. And sensible…I could think of a million other adjectives to describe him before that one popped into my head. And even then, I wouldn’t use it.

“I need a fucking miracle. And to get that, I need to do something that he won’t agree with,” Nora whispers to herself, a cold chill running down my spine at the determination I see in her clear blue eyes.

“You weren’t actually serious, were you? You’re not talking about The Scourge? Please tell me you just said that to your brother to scare him into action?”

She grows silent, making my anxiety multiply tenfold.

“No.” I shake my head. “You can’t.”

“Roe,” she supplicates, seeing the terror in my eyes. “I still have three months to bulk up a little more, but you know that I’m strong. And I’m quick, too. I’m fast and clever. And I don’t get scared easily. I’m a perfect candidate. I know I can win the games.”

“But it’s not up to you,” I reply hurriedly, not wanting her to entertain such an idea. “You can’t volunteer for The Scourge. You have to be picked. You know that.”

She goes into deep thought, her lips thinning into a fine line.

“There are always loopholes to everything in life. And if the games have one, I’ll find it.”

My God.

She’s serious.

She’s actually serious.

“You’ll die, Nora,” I let out a pathetic cry, my fear getting the best of me. “You’ll die.”

She runs the back of her hand over my cheeks, my eyes watering as she does it.