Page 44 of By His Play

She’s gone.

A sob erupts as Kieran takes the turn that will lead us to the parking lot and the very last time I’m going to see Grams.

By the time he pulls the car to a stop, I’m trembling violently.

Kieran kills the engine and turns to me, his brows pulled together in concern.

“You don’t have to do this,” he says softly.

Licking my lips, the salty taste of my tears floods my mouth.

“I know,” I whisper, my voice cracked and barely audible. “But I want to. I need to say g-goodb-bye.”

He blows out a breath before nodding.

“Okay. But the second you want to leave, tell me.”

I nod, unable to say another word as my chest tightens to the point I can barely suck in a breath.

My eyes track Kieran as he walks around the hood of the car before he opens my door and helps me out.

Together, we walk toward the doors, but as soon as we step inside, my legs freeze when reality hits even harder.

Knowing I need more than just his hand in mine, Kieran stands in front of me and takes my face.

“I’m right here, Effie. You’re not doing this alone.”

‘I know,’ I mouth before sucking in a deep breath and taking another step.

Tucked into his side, we walk toward Grams’ room.

Laura, her main nurse, spots us from her station and rushes over with a morose expression on her face.

Kieran’s grip on me tightens, but I don’t have the brain power to figure out why.

The staff here deal with loss on a weekly basis, I’m sure. I have no idea how they do it.

Their patients might not be their relatives, but losing them, especially those who’ve been here for a significant amount of time, must hurt. I don’t know how I could keep going through that.

“Effie, I’m so sorry for your loss,” she says without breaking eye contact with me. “Would you like to see her?”

I nod, and she instantly spins around and walks toward Grams’ room.

“She’s all ready for you. Take as much time as you need.”

“Thank you,” Kieran says curtly, following me inside when she holds the door open for us.

I’ve barely crossed the threshold when I stop dead.

I can’t do this.

The warmth of Kieran’s body sears into my back as his arms wrap around my waist and his chin rests on top of my head.

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” he says softly. “No one has any expectations of you right now.”

His words mean everything to me, and they give me the strength to keep moving forward.

He releases me but stays just a step behind as I walk deeper into the room.

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