Page 43 of By His Play

Usually, I’d be self-conscious about my huge, unsexy cotton panties, but right now, I couldn’t care less.

In seconds, he has the waistband in place and is gently tugging the hoodie over my head and letting it fall almost to my knees.

He finds my sliders—not what I would usually choose to pair with this outfit—and then takes my hand and pulls me along.

Numbly, I follow behind him as he walks toward his room.

He leaves me in the doorway, and a memory of only a few hours ago niggles at the back of my mind.

“As a best friend, yes. But I’m not in love with her. I’ve never been in love with her.”

I don’t know why the words stung as much as they did. I know they're true. But still…

I watch as he zips up his hoodie and shoves his feet into his sneakers, then he tucks me under his arm and ushers me out into the cold, dark night.

Silence fills the car, but I don’t have it in me to break it.

Distraction seems like it would be a good idea, but just the thought of focusing on something other than Grams right now feels wrong.

When Kieran signals to turn off the freeway that will take us to the care home, I don’t question him.

I trust that he knows what he’s doing.

Less than two minutes later, the lights for a twenty-four-seven drive-thru Starbucks come into view, and my stomach knots.

There’s no way I can handle anything right now.

He turns in and lowers his window.

He doesn’t ask what I want; instead, he rattles off an order that includes all my favorites.

I love him so much in that moment, even if I don’t want any of the things he’s about to pay for.

With everything loaded on the center console, he continues toward where I need to be.

“Please, Effie. At least drink some water,” he says, holding out a bottle for me.

Absently, I take it and twist the top, but as soon as I take a sip, my stomach turns over, and I lower it back down.

Blowing out a long sigh, I rest my head back and lift my feet to the seat so I can curl up in a ball.

Kieran reaches over and entwines his fingers with mine, silently supporting me and reminding me that he’s right beside me, just like he promised.

After what I did, I wouldn’t be able to argue if he turned his back on me and returned to Chicago.

I hurt him. I hurt him badly.

And it wasn’t just a simple lie, either. I mean, it was when only Grams and I knew.

But it’s out in the open now. The whole world knows about our “engagement,” and they all want to know more.

I didn’t unlock my cell once yesterday. I couldn’t.

Of course, no one knows who I am; my socials are locked down as best I can, but I still exist, and I have no doubt the press and the fans have found me. I can only imagine the kind of comments and messages I’ve received.

Another sigh passes my lips as I slump lower in the seat. I’m so numb; it’s almost possible to forget what we’re about to go and do.

The moment the care home sign comes into view, though, everything comes crashing back.

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