Page 150 of By His Play

Head out of the gutter, Effie.

It’s over.

Done.

You’re just friends again now.

“Give it half an hour. You’ll be starving.”

Lifting the edge of the towel, he wipes it over his hair before backing away.

“I won’t be long,” he says as I step around the kitchen counter, my eyes on the huge couch in the living room. He’s almost at the bedroom when he speaks again.

I’m not expecting it, or the deepness of his voice, and it startles me.

“My shirt certainly looks better on you,” he confesses.

“O-oh…um…”

“Enjoy your coffee,” he says with a smirk before ducking into the bedroom and out of my sight.

“Fuck,” I hiss as I lower my ass to the couch.

He’s just Kieran, I remind myself.Your best friend.

Squeezing my eyes closed, I try to calm the riot of emotions inside me.

There’s a part of me that is desperate to say, “fuck the rules,” and follow him into the shower. But there’s another part that just wants this morning over with.

I want to get in my car alone, put some Taylor Swift on, and try to get myself together, to find even just a little bit of the strength I’m going to need back in Chicago.

The sound of the shower running taunts me, but no matter how much I might want to join him, I know I can’t.

The line has been drawn between us now.

Put it behind you, Effie.

You agreed to this.

Focus on the future, not the past.

I repeat that little mantra over and over as I sip my coffee, and the second Kieran emerges fresh from the shower, I jump from the couch and rush into the bedroom.

“What do you want for?—”

I slam the door before he can finish the sentence.

Grabbing the small bag I found in the closet yesterday evening, I gather everything I need before locking myself in the bathroom.

After dumping everything on the counter, I turn the shower on before stumbling back.

I hit the wall as a sob rips from my throat.

I don’t know how I’m supposed to do this.

Dropping my head into my hands, I fight like hell not to break down.

Not now.

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