Page 84 of Sworn to Protect

MACKENZIE

“You know,he may have his reasons for not telling you. Did you even let him explain?” Jill asks, arms crossed as she leans against the counter.

Two days. That’s how long it’s been since our fight. Since I told Nate to leave. And I haven’t heard from him since.

“There’s nothing to explain,” I say, my voice flat. “I don’t like being lied to.”

I watched my father lie and use my mom enough times than I can count. I won’t tolerate it. The one good thing about Ethan? He was never home long enough to lie to me. But he excelled at using me. I kept up the image of a perfect family for the short moments he was around, fooling myself into believing it was real.

“Still,” Jill presses. “People have their reasons. You should hear him out.”

“He knew Ethan,” I snap, my frustration boiling over. “Not onlyknewhim, he wasfriendswith him. Ethan didn’t have many of those, trust me. And yet Nate, who spent time with my kids, withme, never once mentioned it. Not once! That hurts the most.”

Jill’s expression softens. “I know, honey. And I get it. It was wrong. But his reasoning may surprise you. You need to listen to him to make an informed decision.”

I shake my head. “Maybe eventually, but I need time to wrap my head around what he did first.”

Jill tilts her head. “And then what?”

I hesitate. “Then … I don’t know. Dating him was supposed to be temporary. We both knew he would eventually leave.” But even as I say the words, they feel hollow. Being with him never felt temporary.

There was an ease between us—a connection I’d never had with another man. Like the past didn’t matter. And then there’s the way he could undo me with just a look, the way I responded to him like caffeine to a coffee addict.

But I have to draw the line.

My brother was right. I never should have let the kids get so close. Or myself.

The kids.

A lump rises in my throat. I haven’t seen them this sad since the military officers showed up at our door. But this? This almost feels worse.

Because Natechoseto leave.

And they blame me for it.

I rub my temples. I can’t do anything right.

Jordan warned me. I should’ve listened. Maybe Nate wasn’t after my money, but that doesn’t change the fact that he gutted me just the same.

Jill sighs. “How did you end things? Did you leave it open-ended so you two can have anactualconversation?”

I level her with a look. “I told him to leave and that I never wanted to see him again.”

Her mouth falls open. “Oh, honey.”

I groan, sinking onto a stool. “Considering this is the second day he hasn’t been in to get his morning coffee, I’d say I got my wish.”

Jill shakes her head. “And you’re happy about that?”

No. I hate how that makes me feel. How every morning since, I’ve glanced toward the café door, waiting. Hoping.

Jill watches me for a moment before setting her hand over mine. “Why don’t you take the rest of the day off. Youneedit.”

“You don’t mind?”

“Of course not. It’s slow anyway.”

I exhale in relief and take off my smock. “I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. You know that, right?”

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