Page 43 of All Along

This is everything I ever wanted. Everything I ever dreamed of. Everything I never thought I’d have.

Caleb – the man I’ve wanted since our kiss in the library senior year of high school – is in this bed with me after making love to me all night long.

A sliver of doubt creeps in. Is this everything Caleb wants? Or was he merely letting off steam? Carried away by the moment. I did kiss him first after all.

Maybe I should go home before things get awkward.

I lift Caleb’s arm and slide toward the edge of the bed. I’m nearly there when his arm clamps down on me.

“Where are you going? I’m not done with you yet.”

Despite having more orgasms last night than I’ve had in the past year, I shiver as excitement bolts through me. I imagine allthe dirty things Caleb can do to me and my panties dampen in response.

I roll around to face him. I frown when I notice he’s wearing a long sleeved t-shirt and sweats. The only skin exposed is his hands and face. He’s afraid I’ll be repelled by any scars he has.

He doesn’t understand. Those scars are pieces of him. And I love him. I wouldn’t be repelled by him.

Fear snakes through my belly.I love Caleb. I’ve denied my feelings for too many years. Claimed we’re friends and I didn’t want more. But I can’t deny my feelings any longer. Not after last night. I blew the ‘we’re just friends’ excuse to smithereens.

Speaking of friends.

“Last night doesn’t have to mean anything.”

His brow furrows. “Doesn’t have to mean anything?”

“We can go back to being friends.”

Those words kill me to say but I don’t want to lose Caleb. If friends is all he’s capable of, I’ll take what I can get.

“Go back to being friends?”

“Are you going to repeat everything I say this morning?”

“When you say stupid shit, yes.”

I scowl. “I didn’t say stupid shit.”

“Saying we can go back to being friends is stupid.”

Does Caleb not want to be friends anymore? My heart squeezes, and I find it difficult to catch my breath. I can’t lose him.

“You don’t want to be friends anymore?”

“Nope.”

I grasp my chest as pain lances through it. I’m losing Caleb. I’m such an idiot. I never should have had sex with him. Sex ruins everything. I know better.

I’ve read thousands of romance novels. I know what happens when the couple has sex before one of them is ready to admit they want more.

Realization hits me. Caleb doesn’t want more. He was scratching an itch last night.

“Stop,” he growls.

Tears well in my eyes. I blink to stop them from falling but it’s a lost cause. They course down my face.

Caleb wraps his arms around me. “Fuck.”

I fight his hold. “Let me go.”

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