Page 36 of Scoring Grey

I run my hand through my hair as she sits on the bench. I can tell that truth bomb isn’t setting well with her either, but I don’t see anger like I thought I would. She lost time with me too. I know she wants us to be a family. I’ve always known it, but I gave her space. I fucking stayed away when it was the last thing I wanted to do; when I knew staying away broke her fucking heart, I did it anyway. I know she cried whenever I left the house after Adler was born. What she doesn’t know is I’d cry too.

Most nights, I didn’t leave, at least not in the way she thought I had. I never wanted to leave her or my son. Instead, I’d go to her window and listen to her cry, tears that brought me to my knees. Every night she cried, I cried with her. I’d expect that girl who spent more hours crying about what I believed was a love loss would have a different reaction than the one I’m seeing now, which makes me think there’s more. If there’s one thing I’ve learned with Eloise, there’s always more.

“Cal, I’m not sure what to say.”

“How come you didn’t tell me?”

She furrows her brow.

“About Adler. You believed I was choosing another woman over you, but when school ended and I went off to college, you had to have known we weren’t together, and you still never told me about our son.”

I’ll never forget coming home for the holidays and watching Arlo pull a car seat out of his car at one of the local grocery stores with what looked like his identical twin at the same time Eloise came walking out the front doors with a very blond-haired baby attached to her front, walking to her own separate vehicle. I felt like I’d been punched in the gut. I knew it was mine the second I saw her with that baby.

A door slams on the opposite side of the rink, and we both snap our focus in the direction to find no one there. She releases an anxious breath. “This isn’t the place to have this conversation.” She rises from the bench. “If practice is over, I’d like to go home. I’ll meet you outside.”

I step off the ice and reach her in three long strides before she can leave the bench. “Eloise, wait.” I grab her wrist. “I don’t want this to overshadow what we shared on the ice. I’m tired of taking ten steps back for every one we take forward. I’m not mad at you. I’ve never been mad at you…” I drop my head. “It just hurts, and I hate that we can’t take any of it back.”

She steps into me. “I know, and we didn’t take ten steps back, but I don’t like talking about us here.” Her eyes leave mine to trail around the empty stadium, and I get it. It’s a little eerie. “If it makes you feel better, I believe you. I watched you. When you thought I wasn’t looking, I was. I saw how you were with Blair when you thought there was a chance I might see, but I also watched long enough to see how you pulled away from her every time you assumed the coast was clear. Either way, it doesn’t matter. She’s in the past.”

I can’t help but grimace at her words, and of course, she doesn’t miss it.

“What’s wrong? Did you pull a muscle at practice?”

I close my eyes and shake my head. I’ve been putting off telling her about Blair working with the Kings. Every time I was going to bring it up, I couldn’t. Things between us have been good, and I haven’t been in a hurry to rock the boat, but I have to tell her. “I need to tell you something, but I need you to promise me you’ll hear me,” I plead as I grab her other wrist.

“Cal, you’re making me worry.”

“You have no need to worry. You’re all I ever wanted. You’re the only girl I see, but…” I release a breath of resolve through my nose. “Last Friday, it was announced Blair Wyndham would be the team’s new publicist, and as such, she’ll be around a lot.”

Her ice-blue eyes stay locked on mine, but her face is impassive. There’s no telling what’s running through her brain. I can’t take it.

“Tell me, Eloise. Say it. Say whatever it is that you’re thinking so we can think it through together.”

Her lips pinch together. “You didn’t tell me because you were worried about how I’d react?”

“Yes.” I step into her. “I refuse to lose you again. I didn’t want the girl I used to get back at you for breaking us to be what divided us again. I planned on telling you, but when is there ever a good time to say, my ex is back in town, and I have to see her every day.”

“I understand,” she says flatly, which ticks me off a little. I expected a little tendril of jealousy or animosity. This news has been weighing on me like a ton of bricks, stressing me out to no end, and all she says is, ‘I understand?’

“That’s it. You’re really not bothered?”

“I didn’t say that. I’ve never liked Blair, but that’s because she’s always had a chip on her shoulder. She hated me before I ever met you. For a long time, I believed she only showed interest in you because you were mine?—”

My mouth crashes to hers. It can’t be helped. She just used the word mine in reference to me, and I was gone. I release her wrists and slide my hands around her waist, pulling her close. As our lips meld together and her sweet tongue dips inside my mouth, my cock hardens. I let myself steal two more seconds before breaking apart.

“What was that for?”

“My girl just claimed me.” She raises a brow. “You said I was yours.”

She smiles, and her hands fist in my jersey. “Okay, but why did you stop kissing me?” She pushes up on her tippytoes for another, which I grant because God help me, I could never tell her no.

I groan before releasing her once more. “I stopped because you letting me kiss you like that is causing a situation.” I grab a heavy handful of her firm cheek before adding, “And less than ten minutes ago, you told me you weren’t ready for more.” She knowingly bites her lip before dropping back down, and I slap her ass. “Come on, let’s get out of here. I have three hours before I have to catch a plane.”

As I pull her toward the locker room, confident the team didn’t hang around to shower when we have to leave town, she says, “Do you find it odd that she’s suddenly here when we’re getting back together?”

“I’m not sure if odd is the word I’d use. Annoying and inconvenient feel like better choices, but…” I stop and look up and down the hall before saying, “You were right earlier. We shouldn’t talk about this here.”

Her eyes narrow on mine, and she speaks softly. “You don’t trust her either?”

---